It was sit down and talk time today. And that was just for me! I had to have a long sit-down with myself. I've been stretching myself out too thin, doing everything all wrong. I've been trying to hold on to things and the way I do things.
I had a lot of decisions to make. No matter what I did, there would be people who wouldn't like the decisions, which is the nature of such decisions.
Well, I made them.
Here they are.
First, I've decided not to audition tonight. Not only am I not that excited by the play but I'm also working on a book right now. It's going very well. I am 1/4 of the way through, which is 25,000 words! I'm going to keep writing. If a play comes up and I want to do it, I'll audition but I won't audition just for the sake of something to do - I HAVE something to do.
Second... well, the second one is the toughest one.
Last year, I thought I would put together the last monologue CD. It was called "Ken 3.8". But Vicky asked me to create one for this year, about the wedding.
So, I spent about a month writing and rewriting a monologue about the wedding. It was a Ken monologue. It was dark. It was funny.
It was completely unnecessary.
It talked about personal problems and triumphs and was kind of cool... or would have been... had I been single.
Look, here's the thing. I'm married now. Vicky's my family. I have no problem eviscerating myself for an audience but when it comes to dragging Vicky out on stage... well...
So, I've decided that I won't be creating a "Ken 3.9". There will be no wedding monologue. Vicky doesn't know about this. She's finding out like you are - and I don't expect her to be too pleased about it. But there are some things that are kept within the family: the tragic, the ecstatic, the mundane. I don't need to tell you about the wedding. Friends can watch the DVD. Readers know I love Vicky.
And Vicky does, too.
There. Decision made. I feel much better now.
Have I mentioned it's been nearly a month since my last cigarette?