As Anal As It Gets...

“How can you be so meticulous about that and such a pig in real life?”

Vicky has said that to me more than once.

I have a confession. I eat in order.

Yes. You heard me.

I eat in order.

Salad – Veggie – Main Course – Dessert… unless I’m allowed to start with dessert, then I go backwards… sometimes…

So, I’m eating some trial mix with lunch, some really good, healthy, Bear Naked trail mix.

Cashews, Walnuts, Sunflower Seeds, Almonds, Pumpkin Seeds, Raisins, Cranberries, and Dark Chocolate Chips.

… what a nightmare.

The reason I can’t eat them all at once is not a Jack Nicholson, As Good As It Gets, moment. I don’t have to wash my hands 14 times after, seven on one side and seven on the other, with a new bar of soap each time, turning the light on and off as I go. I am not OCD.

The thing is, I don’t want to ruin my flavors. I don’t know when this started. Maybe it’s a throwback from childhood when 1) my mom cooked so poorly that it was best to mix everything together in the hopes it balanced out, or 2) you had to eat fast lest my brother take it from you. I don’t know. But there I am with my trail mix.

The trick here is that I want those dark chocolate chips.

But I don’t want to ruin them. I’m not a big fan of Almonds or Cashews (um, raw, by the way and unsalted… I’m trying to be healthy) or Sunflower Seeds; I don’t want to mix my perfectly good dark chocolate with that mess. So, I start by picking out the Cashews and Almonds. Easy enough. I then move on to the seeds group – but the Walnuts are in the way. Now, I love Walnuts so I gobble those down, too. Now, to get the seeds, it helps if they stick to something; they’re so small. Raisins and Cranberries help out with this.

And that leaves me with the dark chocolate. The wonderful dark chocolate.

There’s like four chips in there.

Why did I get trail mix, anyway?