One Path

Climbing Maya on Diet Soap...

2012-01-30T03:45:00.000-08:00

Last November, I recorded an interview for the Diet Soap podcast. This week, I'm happy to announce that the episode featuring my interview about my book, Climbing Maya, is available at this location:

http://dietsoap.podomatic.com/entry/2012-01-30T01_51_45-08_00

I hope you enjoy it. Doug Lain puts together a surreal mix of discussion and music and words. Be sure to check out the excerpt from his book, Wave of Mutilation, after the interview! And many thanks to Doug for having me on!

I can now announce...

2012-01-23T11:39:00.000-08:00

Everyone is looking for success in their life but how can you be expected to find it if you don't know what it is?

Some time ago, as one friend was dying of leukemia, another friend succumbed to alcoholism, and I found myself unemployed, I decided to find the answer to “What is success?” If it’s different for everyone, why do we have just one term to describe it? Can it really be summed up in one word or do we need to broaden our understanding? And are the avenues of success we are so often sold – wealth, career, family – the answer to the question?

Now, I'm happy to announce that my philosophical memoir on success, Climbing Maya, will be published by Solstice Publishing.

Release dates and other details will follow...

Watch this space...

2012-01-20T10:01:00.001-08:00

Sorry I've been so quiet of late. I've been working on some good news. I can't announce it just yet because things could fall apart at any point and then I'd even have to retract this hint that something may be coming so I'll just shut up now...

... but it's going to be pretty big...

Seizure Dog…

2012-01-14T01:15:00.000-08:00

Wednesday night, Vicky and I were treated to something new. After she had already spent the previous week being sick and in and out of emergency room vets, Shipoopi revealed to us that she was also epileptic

… and she didn’t do it with a tasteful card, either.

Nope. We’re talking epileptic dog all over the floor.

Vicky scooped up the dog like a commando. “ER Vet! Stat!”

Okay, she might not have yelled “Stat!” but you get the idea.

As it turned out, Shipoopi’s seizure passed before we were in the car and, after a conversation with our vet the next day, we now have her on anti-seizure meds that are supposed to help. And I hope they help soon because we’re talking three nights in a row!

I don’t write just because of how sad I am for the poor dog but also because of how sad I am for our finances. The ER Vet cost a bundle – a big bundle! I don’t know how much more money we can spend on keeping this dog alive. And this bothers me because I have never been the type of person to advocate spending a bundle on keeping a pet alive. I’m usually the first to say “You can get a new one for far less.”

But love does crazy things to people and Vicky and I love Shipoopi. We must – considering how much we’re spending on her. It’s not really a rational train of thought but sometimes you’re not necessarily rational. You just do what you have to do.

So, Shipoopi is now Seizure Dog and she’ll be on seizure meds for the rest of her little life, however long that is… and I hope it’s a very long time.

Belly button logic...

2012-01-07T09:47:00.000-08:00

Ken: If you think about it, your belly button is the youngest part of yourself.

Vicky: (disagreeing) Hair.

Ken: True... and skin... and every cell in your body which is replaced every seven years or so...

...

Vicky and I often have conversations like this, as strange as they may sound; I'm just glad I found a woman who speaks the same language as me. :-)

STAR WARS XXX: A PORN PARODY-official trailer

2012-01-06T16:45:00.000-08:00

... I suppose it was bound to happen...

One night at the vet…

2012-01-06T15:51:00.000-08:00

Shipoopi got sick this week and, of course, getting her better cost way more money than you want to know about – it was way more than I wanted to know about, believe me. Right when we’re getting back on our feet – kapow!

Vicky’s attitude is always, “Pay whatever it takes,” and while mine is more like “I have to pay what?!” I know better than to say that. I just look at Vicky with a smile and sign, sign, sign.

Ugh.

While I was sitting here, thinking about what I should write, I realized just how trite it all sounds. I mean, everyone knows someone who has been through the sick pet/sick child/sick whatever experience. It happens. So, I decided not to dwell too much on that.

There’s something else I wanted to mention, though, and it happened the second morning when we were at the emergency room vet. We had to bring Shipoopi in on Sunday night, which was a holiday, and pick her up the next morning, which was also a holiday – and that made getting her to the regular vet pretty damned interesting, too.

We’re there on Monday morning to pick her up – we were told to get there around 6am and through a series of mishaps stayed until after 9am – and Vicky is telling me about how she has to finish payroll for her employees to get paid. I, having nothing else going on in my life (it’s not like I was going to do any writing that morning or, for that matter, at all that day), said to her, “Go home and do it. I can take care of things here.” After a bit of our usual back and forth, she finally went.

And I was alone.

Inside a crowded pet ER. After a while, after I’d run out of things to kill my boredom (even my phone had died so there went that!), I began actually paying attention to the other people there. And it occurred to me that this is the last thing we do. We’re so isolated from each other, we live our lives as if we’re perpetually inside an elevator; at least, that’s how it seems to me.

I witnessed a family lose their pet. I witnessed two women fear for the health of someone they loved. I shared a moment with another couple of women as we both found ourselves caught in the same process. And it slowly began to dawn on me just how wrong it is that we are all so separated in this experience. There were easily 30-35 people in there and so many of us were distanced.

I wish I could say the experience made me a better person or that I was the person I hope to be. No. Not really. I exchanged a little small talk with the two women whose dog was also sick but that was about it. It did remind me, though, that I need to work harder at that. I tend to instinctively isolate myself and live within my own bubble and, in those instances when I’m sharing an experience with others, I need to remember to step outside that bubble and connect.

That’s all I wanted to say.

A look at ethics...

2012-01-03T15:42:00.000-08:00

Here's why I am writing a book on ethics in one photograph.

This plastic display of plastic water bottles (in an office supply store of all places) will still be around (probably in the ocean somewhere) long after you and I are dead and, somehow, our present system of ethics doesn't tell us there's something very wrong here.

Clearly, we need a new system and I look forward to completing this book and sharing a new look at ethics soon.

Assessing and Reassessing for the New Year...

2012-01-01T07:28:00.001-08:00

This month's Recovering The Self article comes just in time for the New Year!

http://www.recoveringself.com/guest-blogger/ken-la-salle/assessing-and-reassessing

Digital tunage, CDs, and about time I entered the 21st century…

2011-12-23T12:23:00.000-08:00

No, I’m not selling another book… just yet. I know that what this place has been for a while but I’m taking a break… for now. (I would still appreciate if you bought one of my books, of course.)

So, I was out driving the other day, listening to some music when the cd ended. CDs are what I keep my music on. It’s a small, disk-like storage medium, which after the demise of records and tapes, lasted all of a quarter century or so. When I went to eject the disk, my cd player decided it had suffered enough embarrassment at me actually still listening to cds… and promptly died.

Aw.

Recently, I found out that Vicky is giving me an iPod for whatever the hell I celebrate as an atheist – for her, it’s Xmas or some shit – basically, it’s a day we shower each other with gifts. How’s that for an American holiday?

Knowing I was getting an iPod, I realized all my cds were going to become pointless. More than that, I realized I’d have to take each disk, one by one, and load them onto my pc so I could later load their contents onto my iPod… pain in the ass!

So, one by one, I went about it. I loaded music and audiobooks and comedy and spoken word and on and on and everything else until… actually, I’m not even done, yet. But it’s looking like I’m going to end up with 25 days worth of content for my iPod.

Twenty-five days!

Crap.

If you consider that my commute – yes, I got another job in the last few weeks. It’s a part-time tech writing gig but it pays the bills while allowing me to keep working on my writing career. Anyway, if you consider that my commute is 45 minutes long, it’s gonna take a shitload of commute for me to listen to all that shit!

Sounds like fun to me!

Holiday Shopping: A Hex Returns To Rynia...

2011-12-20T01:13:00.000-08:00

With the holidays coming, all the Rynia books are available in digital format!

The series concludes (for now) with the final book of the Sons of Rynia trilogy: A Hex Returns to Rynia

In the first two volumes of the Sons of Rynia trilogy (A Hex To Save Rynia and A Hex Beyond Rynia), Tsurtor attacked the realm of Rynia with weapons of magic and technology, scattering its defendants to the winds. How can Tsurtor be defeated when A Hex Returns to Rynia?

You can find A Hex Returns To Rynia for all e-readers:

For the Kindle (and Kindle-app): http://www.amazon.com/Hex-Returns-Rynia-Sons-ebook/dp/B005O0QHX0/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_8

For all e-readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/90200

Holiday Shopping: A Hex Beyond Rynia...

2011-12-14T07:36:00.000-08:00

With the holidays coming, all the Rynia books are available in digital format!

The series begins with the stand-alone: A Hex Upon Rynia
This is followed by the Sons of Rynia trilogy: A Hex to Save Rynia, A Hex Beyond Rynia, A Hex Returns To Rynia

A Hex To Save Rynia witnessed the first battles in the war between Rynia and its old enemy, Tsurtor. Tsurtor launches that war with devastating effect in the second book of the Sons of Rynia trilogy: A Hex Beyond Rynia.

You can find A Hex Beyond Rynia for all e-readers:
For the Kindle (and Kindle-app): http://www.amazon.com/Hex-Beyond-Rynia-Sons-ebook/dp/B005MGFL0Q/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_3
For all e-readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/88008

Holiday Shopping: A Hex To Save Rynia...

2011-12-12T08:09:00.000-08:00

With the holidays coming, all the Rynia books are available in digital format!

The series begins with the stand-alone: A Hex Upon Rynia
This is followed by the Sons of Rynia trilogy: A Hex to Save Rynia, A Hex Beyond Rynia, A Hex Returns To Rynia

A Hex Upon Rynia was just the beginning. The Sons of Rynia trilogy kicks off with Tsurtor’s return, dragons, a conspiracy against the king, and a war-ravaged planet. When Hex is imprisoned back on Earth, will there be A Hex To Save Rynia?

You can find A Hex To Save Rynia for all e-readers:
For the Kindle (and Kindle-app): http://www.amazon.com/Hex-Save-Rynia-Sons-ebook/dp/B005I571HM/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_4
For all e-readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/82603

Holiday Shopping: A Hex Upon Rynia...

2011-12-11T08:20:00.001-08:00

The book that began the Rynia series, A Hex Upon Rynia, is now available as an e-book!

Hex is a wizard unlike any you’ve seen before. He creates living toys from twigs and brings his skates to life! When he mistakenly brings himself and a boy named Vincent to the world of Rynia, however, he’ll need to win a war to get them home again!

You can find A Hex Upon Rynia
For your Kindle (and Kindle-App): http://www.amazon.com/A-Hex-Upon-Rynia-ebook/dp/B004ZZMS24/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_2
And for all e-readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/58564

Holiday Shopping: The Incarnations of Death...

2011-12-08T08:04:00.001-08:00

Death! Just in time for the holidays!

When Robert Erwon Mitchel finds a way to kill Death, he sets off a chain of events that gives birth to a new breed of superheroes. Now it is up to these heroes - Night Stalker, Fade, and Force - to find a way to stop the insane replacement for Death, one who can wipe out entire cities at a whim and who is hunting down the scientist who killed his predecessor!

Pick up The Incarnations of Death this holiday season
For your Kindle (and Kindle-App): http://www.amazon.com/The-Incarnations-of-Death-ebook/dp/B004XJ4MNU/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_9
Or for all E-Readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/54829

Timely Holiday Shopping: The Rohan Scripts...

2011-12-06T19:53:00.001-08:00

Here's a blatant ploy in time for the holidays:

The Prophesies of Nicoli Rohano, The Rohan Scripts, were the stuff of legend and were all but lost to history… until now! The Rohan Scripts, the latest sci-fi adventure from Ken La Salle, brings you psychics and scientists, assassination plots and time paradox, with a single man flung through time and recording everything into a book of prognostication called: The Rohan Scripts!

You can find The Rohan Scripts
For your Kindle (and Kindle-app device): http://www.amazon.com/The-Rohan-Scripts-ebook/dp/B004Y752MG/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_10
And for all e-readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/56224

Do Something Impossible...

2011-12-06T16:42:00.001-08:00

This month on Recovering the Self: Do Something Impossible! (Just click the link to check it out!)

(Yes, I know this was a short entry but - never fear - there's plenty more over at Recovering the Self!)

Holiday Shopping (now with IRONY): Vampire Society...

2011-12-04T13:41:00.001-08:00

Who can spot the irony in my suggesting you purchase Vampire Society as a gift this season?

"Vampire Society is a guided tour through the social and political evolution that opened our century. It is a love story and an indictment against our culture of consumption, answering the most important question about love: Is real love possible in the Vampire Society?"

You can find Vampire Society
For Your Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Vampire-Society-ebook/dp/B0016NACSK/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_11
For All E-Readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/52031

Holiday Shopping: A Grand Canyon...

2011-12-02T15:39:00.001-08:00

Subtitled, "“How to Meet the Love of Your Life in Five Short Years… and mean it this time!”

This is for anyone curious what life was like before Vicky...

Find it for your Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Grand-Canyon-Journey-Depression-ebook/dp/B004TGSRGA/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_1
Or for any e-reader: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/52601

Enjoy with my many thanks!

Dear Muppets: We Like You...

2011-12-02T09:54:00.001-08:00

So, Vicky and I went out to see The Muppets last night... it wasn't a terrible movie...

But to see the Muppets (or, for that matter, The Muppets) and come out with "It wasn't terrible," is, well, terrible. It's the Muppets, for crying out loud! It should have been great!

It could have been great!

The problem, however, was that the Muppets were so damned insecure - as were the writers, director, and just about everybody. They kept trying to impress on the audience how downright good they are, how wholesome, how much a reminder of a by-gone era. Yes, I get it! The 70's were a simpler time but that doesn't mean you have to suck up so much! We already like you! Just perform!

I kept expecting a commercial for the line of toys, because it kept feeling like the setup for a line of toys.

I'm not saying it was bad. It wasn't. It just wasn't all that good. Next time, maybe the Muppets will have a bit more confidence in themselves. Or maybe they'll just recapture that spirit of going on an adventure without having to constantly comment that they're going on an adventure and doesn't that make this a great opportunity to learn a lesson...

Just go in with your expectations low. They need your support. And maybe a hug.

Holiday Shopping: Evertime and Evermore...

2011-11-30T07:39:00.001-08:00

Buy some poetry for Christmas

It's real sweet but not with HFCS (pronounced "Hif-cas")

In Evertime and Evermore, playwright and author Ken La Salle collects some of his favorite poems for the first time. Some were taken from the darkest places from his life, like The Slaughterhouse (It is industry that has a reason in a world of others who wish to slaughter, themselves). Others are far more whimsical (Even organ donors have to face a little rejection. Might as well enjoy yourself a little pickle-type confection).

Pick up Evertime and Evermore

For the Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Evertime-Evermore-collection-poetry-ebook/dp/B004TGV64A/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_5

Or for all e-readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/52257

Death Misses this Christes... mas...

2011-11-28T07:54:00.000-08:00

Looking for goofy tales of death this Christmas? Who isn't?!

"These works by Ken La Salle range from the bizarre to the morbid and even further beyond still. In Death Misses and other tales of death, Ken La Salle treats you to a dozen deadly tales to keep you up at night."

Be sure not to miss Death here:
For the Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Death-Misses-other-tales-ebook/dp/B004URUWN4/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_6
And for all e-readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/53208

Holiday Shopping: Blue Food...

2011-11-26T14:13:00.000-08:00

If you're looking for the perfect holiday gift, why not try a little Blue Food?

"The works of Ken La Salle range from the bizarre to the whimsical and even further beyond still. In Blue Food and other menu items, Ken La Salle treats you to a dozen tales, hilarious and deeply strange."

You can find Blue Food in digital formats:
For the Kindle: http://www.amazon.com/Blue-Food-other-items-ebook/dp/B004TYYX1A/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_7
And all e-readers: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/51617

Why Demi and Ashton matter to me

2011-11-17T21:54:00.000-08:00

Today Demi Moore announced that she would be filing for divorce from Ashton Kutcher. Tonight Ken asked if I cared about this and I told him yes I do. The news of Demi and Ashton’s split matters to me. It should really come as no surprise and here’s why…

It all started on September 24, 2005. You see, this is the day Ken and I were married and this is also the day that Demi and Ashton were married. Over the past six plus years of marriage Ken and I have been the best of friends, we love spending time together and we are each other’s favorite person. Demi and Ashton seemed happy and in love too. They are two people who want for nothing…they are rich and life seems easy for them. Ken and I are far from rich. We’re doing okay, but we’ve had more than our share of challenges. Life has not been easy for us. Yet, we are still together…our marriage is strong. It may not seem like much of a comparison given that most Hollywood marriages don’t last a decade let alone a lifetime, but this is one that we have a connection to, whether or not we want it. Even though they have the “easy life”, Ken and I have something better…our love.

Podcasting…

2011-11-08T11:04:00.000-08:00

I’m just going to say this: I want to do a podcast. I really do.

In the last half year or so, I’ve started listening to podcasts and they are a lot of fun. I get more from them than I think I get from TV, mostly because I listen to people who interest me talking about things that interest me.

This past weekend, I recorded my first guest spot on a podcast – and I’ll be sure to post that link once it’s up – and it was tons of fun. It was on Douglas Lain’s terrific Diet Soap podcast. We discussed Climbing Maya and some things about writing and philosophy in general. My next goal is to get on Jackie Kashian’s wonderful Dork Forest podcast – ONE DAY!

And I realize that won’t be enough. I’m a talker and I know I’m going to want to talk on my own podcast one of these days.

I’m just saying… it may happen…

Loving the Dream in this month's Recovering The Self...

2011-11-02T10:37:00.000-07:00

My monthly blog post for Recovering the Self is up and ready to share and read. This month is about loving yourself and loving the dream you've chosen for yourself.

You can find it at this link.

I hope you enjoy it.

Keep Wall Street Occupied

2011-10-29T15:16:00.000-07:00

Occupying a bit at a time…

2011-10-28T06:31:00.000-07:00

With the Occupy Movement so much in the news, I figured this might be a good time to weigh in again.

As you might know, I was at Occupy OC and marched with them last weekend. It came at a brutal time in my own life, so I thought it might be good to get outside my life a bit and help out where I could – and I did – unfortunately, though, I was too troubled by my own shit to really get into it, so I ended up just going through the motions. In the end, I’m glad I was part of it but wish I had done more.

Since then, of course, several things have happened with the Occupy Movement – many arrests, police brutality, the shooting of Scott Olsen – all in response to peaceful protests, to people simple exercising their first amendment rights.

And in my own life, I’ve had to deal with people who oppose the Occupy Movement – not because they can find anything about it they disagree with but because they have been told, through some mass media or peer pressure, that it would be cool to do so. And this just blows me away. Here is a movement that is peacefully assembling (despite the over-reaction of the police...) to affect political change in an environment where neither major political party will do the right thing for the 99% of citizens with the least economic and political influence. And, yet, they can’t be bothered. This is a movement that is speaking out against responsible people losing their homes. And, yet, they can’t empathize. This is a movement that is speaking against an economic system that refuses to do anything for the millions who have lost their jobs. And, yet, they refuse to care. This is a movement that is asking those in power to stop lying about global climate change and do something about it. And, yet, they don’t seem to think it affects them personally. This is a movement speaking out against the greatest wealth disparity in our country in over a century. And, yet, they don’t see what this has to do with them. This is a movement that is asking for banking regulation, which kept the economy steady until repealed a piece at a time since the 1980s, to be reinstated. And they refuse to understand what this means. This is a movement that is asking that the wealthiest 1% - multi-millionaires - be asked to once again pay their fair share of taxes, something they haven't had to do for decades. And, yet, they side with those who aren’t paying their share. The fact is the Occupy Movement is standing up for a lot more to help those who need it most. Standing against the Occupy Movement is like cheering for the boot pressing down on your own head.

These people say that it’s not as though they don’t understand the reason for protest but they don’t agree exactly 100% with the protesters. As if you must agree exactly 100%. As if you would ever agree with anything 100%. As if nothing is valid unless you agree exactly 100% with it. As if it’s better to side with those against your own self-interests, than to side with anything you agree with 99%.

Then, too, are the folk who parrot back to me the idiotic reasons they’ve been told they should dismiss the protests. “Those people have money,” they say, as if you can’t have a cent and still retain empathy for your fellow man. “Those people own things,” they say, and I wonder what they would say if the protesters were bare-ass naked. The thing is, it’s a false equivalency. And I’ve heard this from other morons as well, this insistence that you can’t challenge the status quo unless you are somehow removed from it – no property, no wealth, no trappings of any kind connected with modern society – or else you’re just as bad as the worse perpetrators. This is clearly nonsense, because the last protesters who went out without any connections were tarred as dirty hippies.

Simply, these people find it easier to fear change and fear what it will take to create change – and here’s hoping Scott Olsen and other victims of police brutality pull through – than to stand up for change. And that’s not right. Listen, I’m no saint and I certainly wasn’t the best protester at Occupy OC. I could have done better. But I’m not going to sit by and listen to you talk crap about something you refuse to understand or that you understand but refuse to stand up for. I’m doing what I can and you should, too.

Will you be in New York on 10/24?...

2011-10-21T13:52:00.000-07:00

I won't be. I'll still be in California. But if you are, you might want to check out my comedy Murielle's Big Date, which is getting a staged reading at the HorseTrade Theater in New York City, off-Broadway.

... and let me know how it goes! (Really wish I could be there....)

And so I reach 46…

2011-10-17T21:08:00.000-07:00

It’s been a hell of a year. I sold a book and had the publisher go belly-up… I found an agent… I had plays produced and read throughout California… and, of course, couldn’t find a job to save my life…

Now, here I am at 46. If I were to live to be 90, I would officially be in the second half of my life. (Actually, I would have been a year ago…) So, as far as my body goes, it’s all downhill from here.

I’m hoping this year works out a little better. I’m knee deep in research for my book on ethics right now and hoping I finish it before 2012. I’d like to hammer out another novel and a couple more plays. Mostly, I’d like things to be a bit more clear and a bit less desperate. I hate living in the fear that we could lose our house any day and I hate not being able to make any damned money.

I’ll keep working, though, and keep trusting in the abilities that got me here, for good or ill. I’ve had too much success to consider myself completely incompetent and not enough to think I’m that great.

Mostly, I guess I’m just hoping for a bit of luck.

… we’ll see…

Occupy Wall Street - statements from and about...

2011-10-05T22:28:00.000-07:00

Hey folks,

I mentioned Occupy Wall Street a while back and I think it's important to follow up. The fact of the matter is if you are not one of the richest 1% in this country, they are on your side, fighting for your rights, and therefore you should support the Occupy movements wherever they are.

I have been trying to find a way to make it to Occupy LA but, logistically, it just won't work. Reality dictates that I keep looking for work over here. But Vicky and I have talked about this and, if things change, I will go and I'll keep you posted on that.

In the meantime, Occupy Wall Street has released its first statement and I think it's important that it gets out. It verbalizes the hopes and endeavours of these good people as they stand up before the heartless corruption of a very small minority. Here, then, is their statement (taken from Daily Kos):

Declaration of the Occupation of New York City

As we gather together in solidarity to express a feeling of mass injustice, we must not lose sight of what brought us together. We write so that all people who feel wronged by the corporate forces of the world can know that we are your allies.

As one people, united, we acknowledge the reality: that the future of the human race requires the cooperation of its members; that our system must protect our rights, and upon corruption of that system, it is up to the individuals to protect their own rights, and those of their neighbors; that a democratic government derives its just power from the people, but corporations do not seek consent to extract wealth from the people and the Earth; and that no true democracy is attainable when the process is determined by economic power. We come to you at a time when corporations, which place profit over people, self-interest over justice, and oppression over equality, run our governments. We have peaceably assembled here, as is our right, to let these facts be known.

They have taken our houses through an illegal foreclosure process, despite not having the original mortgage.

They have taken bailouts from taxpayers with impunity, and continue to give Executives exorbitant bonuses.

They have perpetuated inequality and discrimination in the workplace based on age, the color of one’s skin, sex, gender identity and sexual orientation.

They have poisoned the food supply through negligence, and undermined the farming system through monopolization.

They have profited off of the torture, confinement, and cruel treatment of countless nonhuman animals, and actively hide these practices.

They have continuously sought to strip employees of the right to negotiate for better pay and safer working conditions.

They have held students hostage with tens of thousands of dollars of debt on education, which is itself a human right.

They have consistently outsourced labor and used that outsourcing as leverage to cut workers’ healthcare and pay.

They have influenced the courts to achieve the same rights as people, with none of the culpability or responsibility.

They have spent millions of dollars on legal teams that look for ways to get them out of contracts in regards to health insurance.

They have sold our privacy as a commodity.

They have used the military and police force to prevent freedom of the press.

They have deliberately declined to recall faulty products endangering lives in pursuit of profit.

They determine economic policy, despite the catastrophic failures their policies have produced and continue to produce.

They have donated large sums of money to politicians supposed to be regulating them.

They continue to block alternate forms of energy to keep us dependent on oil.

They continue to block generic forms of medicine that could save people’s lives in order to protect investments that have already turned a substantive profit.

They have purposely covered up oil spills, accidents, faulty bookkeeping, and inactive ingredients in pursuit of profit.

They purposefully keep people misinformed and fearful through their control of the media.

They have accepted private contracts to murder prisoners even when presented with serious doubts about their guilt.

They have perpetuated colonialism at home and abroad.

They have participated in the torture and murder of innocent civilians overseas.

They continue to create weapons of mass destruction in order to receive government contracts.*

To the people of the world,

We, the New York City General Assembly occupying Wall Street in Liberty Square, urge you to assert your power.

Exercise your right to peaceably assemble; occupy public space; create a process to address the problems we face, and generate solutions accessible to everyone.

To all communities that take action and form groups in the spirit of direct democracy, we offer support, documentation, and all of the resources at our disposal.

Join us and make your voices heard!

If Atheism is a Religion, I have a banana in my ear…

2011-10-05T12:49:00.001-07:00

There’s a new meme going around that, somehow, Atheism is a religion.

I’d like to refute this claim with a simple analogy. Religion is like compulsively shoving a banana in your ear. Atheists recognize this and point out the fact that there’s no need to shove a banana in your ear. Claiming that atheism is a religion is comparable to replying, “Oh, yeah? Well, you’re shoving a banana in your ear, too,” even though atheists are, in fact, not.

Here is a simpler analogy. Religion is wishing/praying to a non-existent being for stuff you want. Atheists recognize this and point out the fact that there’s no need to wish/pray. It’s silly. And it’s ludicrous on the face of it to say, “Oh, yeah? Well, you pray, too,” because, no, we don’t.

To claim that atheism is a religion is to expose a central weakness in religion: that everyone else must be just as stupid as you.

And we’re not.

Ken meets… the baby…

2011-10-03T12:59:00.000-07:00

All my life, people have said to me that I’d make a good father one day. This was usually said by parents. They’d hold their kids far out of my reach and say, “Don’t worry, Ken. You’ll make a great father one day.” Okay, maybe they wouldn’t hold the kids out of reach but I did notice their sentiment always twinged with a hint of “Of course, I’m only telling you this because of how pathetic you look. How much longer are you going to wait, anyway?”

Kids have never really been a priority for me and, until Vicky came along, weren’t something I ever really thought would happen. But Vicky did come along and we got very serious about the whole thing, which is to say lots of fucking.

… But, no baby.

Recently, Vicky became an aunt and has been really enjoying aunt-li-hood-ed-ness…

We watched the little rugrat this past weekend for a couple of hours. Now, let me preface this by saying “Cutest Kid Ever”. Seriously, Vicky’s niece is just lovely. Okay?

We got in. The parents took off. And… wailing. Hours of wailing. The kid decided to hit us right upside the head with separation anxiety. “Where’s my momma? Where’s my god-damned mooma? WHERE THE FUCK IS MY FUCKING MOTHER,” the child seemed to want to know.

And I realized in the midst of all this that I missed my window for being a great father. I realized this because
And for Vicky, who was still holding out some hope of us having a child, this wasn’t exactly the best card I could have played. I did worse than just informing her that her husband wasn’t quite suited for parenthood; I also reminded her that things just don’t look good.

At this point, I did a little wailing of my own. On the inside. I hate disappointing Vicky more than anything else and really felt like I’d just crushed her dream. That night, she was reminded of what kind of guy she married: not the right one. This is not to say that we’ll split up but, rather, that relationships are often cast in sharp relief and we are sometimes a bit too harshly of the bad that comes with the good. It may not all be my fault but even if just one night was enough to make Vicky sad, well, that sucked.

Sometimes we don’t win. We don’t get what we want. Our dreams don’t come true. But I love you, Vic. And I’m sorry things haven't worked out the way we wanted them to. But I do love you.

Occupy Everything - Together...

2011-09-28T21:44:00.000-07:00

If you haven't heard about Occupy Wall Street, you should because it's spreading.

Now, Occupy Together seeks to bring this grass-roots movement to your neighborhood and more power to 'em, I say.

I don't know if I'll make it to the LA events but I am surely looking into it.

A Hex Returns To Rynia, Sons of Rynia Book Three, is NOW AVAILABLE…

2011-09-27T14:58:00.000-07:00

Tsurtor has invaded Rynia and scattered its protectors to other kingdoms and other worlds. From the first volume (A Hex to Save Rynia) to the second (A Hex Beyond Rynia), the Sons of Rynia trilogy has begun. And now, the final chapter in the epic Sons of Rynia trilogy is available!

You can find it for your Kindle and Kindle-app equipped reader on Amazon.

You can find it for all e-readers on Smashwords.

I hope you enjoy all the Rynia books and look for more e-books from Ken La Salle coming soon!

OCPA Studios delivers “A Pound of Flesh” to Hunger Artists Theatre...

2011-09-20T13:32:00.000-07:00

Just a taste of some PR I've been floating about...

OCPA Studios continues at Hunger Artists Theatre with the reading of an epic comedy by Ken La Salle, “A Pound of Flesh & The Devil”. “A Pound of Flesh & The Devil” will appear at Hunger Artists Theatre on October 15th at 4pm. Admission is free. For complete directions on how to get to the theater, check the Hunger Artists website at http://www.hungerartists.com/.

“A Pound of Flesh & The Devil” is an epic, historic comedy that was directly inspired by the hit film “Flesh & The Devil” with Greta Garbo and John Gilbert. “A Pound of Flesh & The Devil” skewers the historic melodrama with a 21st century twist, an abundance of inappropriate sexuality… and zombies.
Ken La Salle’s work generally tilts towards the bizarre and twisted, and “A Pound of Flesh & The Devil” fits very well in those categories. You may have seen his comedy, “The Myth of the Cubicle” recently at the OC-Centric New Play Festival at Chapman University. Other plays recently produced included “The Spunk Taste of Hell” at Sacred Fools Theater and “Persecution Complex” at Theatre of NOTE. You can find an extensive interview with Ken, along with a copy of his play “Murielle’s Big Date” on the online magazine Connotation Press: http://connotationpress.com/drama/964-ken-la-salle-drama. His books can be found in ebook format on Amazon.com (for the Kindle) and Smashwords.com (for all e-reader formats). He is represented by Sullivan Maxx Literary Agency.

“A Pound of Flesh & The Devil” will appear at Hunger Artists Theatre on September 10th at 4pm. Admission is free. OCPA Studio’s second season of informal readings has included some of the best plays by local writers. Both organizations are enthusiastic about bringing new and exciting theater to Orange County.

The Orange County Playwrights Alliance (OCPA) began on April 1, 1995 with an informal meeting in an oncologist's office in Anaheim. Since then, OCPA has become the fundamental group for playwrights in O.C., presenting staged readings and productions of plays at venues such as the Hunger Artists Theatre, the Vanguard Theatre, Rude Guerrilla Theatre Company, STAGESTheatre, Chapman University, the Curtis Theatre, and Newport Theatre Arts Center. OCPA playwrights have been produced across the United States, and have won national and regional playwrighting awards. You can find the OCPA website at http://www.ocplaywrights.org/.

Hunger Artists Theatre Company was founded in 1996 and is the first Orange County based alternative theater. Located on the east end of Fullerton's vibrant Theatre Community, Hunger Artists has transformed an industrial warehouse into an unexpected art-house gem. This intimate storefront theatre seats 50 and stages an array of alternative theatrical entertainment. The Hunger Artists have a long tradition of premiering local playwrights from Fengar Gael's "The Cantor's Tale" to Johnna Adams's "Cockfighters" and "Sans Merci". Focusing on innovative storytelling and producing thought-provoking art, The Hunger Artists pride themselves on hosting an annual playwriting festival, "Beyond Convention" to push the boundaries of traditional theater.

A Hex Beyond Rynia, Book Two of the Sons of Rynia Trilogy, now available…

2011-09-16T15:10:00.000-07:00

I’m happy to announce that the second book of the Sons of Rynia trilogy, A Hex Beyond Rynia, is now available for Kindle and all e-readers.

A Hex To Save Rynia, the first book of the series, witnessed the first battles in the war between Rynia and its old enemy, Tsurtor. Tsurtor launches that war with devastating effect in the second book of the Sons of Rynia trilogy: A Hex Beyond Rynia.

The third, and final, installment of the trilogy, A Hex Returns to Rynia, will be released in Fall 2011.

You can find A Hex Beyond Rynia at the following locations:

For your Kindle or Kindle-app, click this link to go to Amazon.

For all other e-readers, clink this link to go to Smashwords.

I thank everyone who has supported me and enjoyed the Rynia books so far and I hope you post your positive review at your point of purchase soon!

Reviews coming in for A Grand Canyon...

2011-09-15T21:24:00.000-07:00

After seeing a couple of reviews for my memoir on depression, A Grand Canyon, I thought I'd give you an update.

The first two were hot and cold, one very positive and the other - well, the guy basically wanted me dead for some reason. But I thought the third one was very special and I'm posting that here now:

This book was an easy read. Felt like reading someones diary but well written. This author is a entertaining writer and his talent can't be dismissed. It was interesting to read about his struggles through his life beginning with his childhood. The topics are sometimes tough to read through, but I did. His writing style makes it so easy to read.

It is difficult to judge someones life's experience. (I think I was glad that wasn't my life) When finishing this book, it made me reflect on all my blessings in life and thank God for his protections in it.

Worth reading!

My favorite quote: "I think I was glad that wasn't my life." Duly noted!

A Grand Canyon: One Man's Journey Through Depression is on sale for all e-readers for only $4.95.
You can pick it up for your Kindle and Kindle-app here.
Or for all other e-readers here.

Thanks for all the positive feedback. I am very happy this book is being enjoyed.

I’m selling my body for medical experiments…

2011-09-12T20:47:00.001-07:00

This actually happened today. I actually signed up to be a guinea pig in a medical experiment.

They promised to pay me a certain amount of money if I allowed them to test drugs on me. I used to manage people and now I’m so poor and so desperate for money thanks to this fucked up economy that I literally took a job from a lab rat.

I had a career in marketing that spanned over a decade. I rose from copywriting to marketing management and now I am holding out a sign that reads, “Will let you dissect me for food.” All this because there are no jobs out there.

I’ve applied to marketing jobs and to office jobs, to full and part time jobs, to every retail job you can imagine. Hell, I apply to anything I can find. I even apply to be a lab animal.

So the question then is this… Can it get worse?

I believe it can.

I could be rejected.

A quick note on the Bible…

2011-09-04T09:31:00.000-07:00

There are plenty of pearls of wisdom trapped in the Bible, like bugs in fossilized shit.

The idea that there’s a magic man in the clouds who drops magic babies down for “virgins” to “give birth to” and then be killed by Jews employed by Mel Gibson, wrapping it all up anticlimactically with Kirk Cameron, is certainly far from one of them…

Bordering on insanity…

2011-09-02T15:44:00.001-07:00

Vicky and I stopped by the local Borders, which is closing down and has marked all its stock down by 60-80%. I could help notice the stacks of books about or “written by” (which is to say not in any way written by) Sarah Palin or Glenn Beck.

Should I be thankful for a discerning public who won’t even buy these books when marked down 80%? Or should I feel ashamed to be part of a society that would encourage such refuse? (After all, that’s what political donations go to these days.)

I’m not sure. Either way, I was glad to be out of the vast graveyard that used to be Borders. Looks like I hardly knew ye…

New Recovering The Self...

2011-08-30T11:55:00.000-07:00

My Recovering The Self piece is up for September. I hope you enjoy it.

This month it's about running your own race and you can find it by clicking this link.

24-Hour Bite Me…

2011-08-25T16:32:00.001-07:00

Here’s a secret: I hate 24-Hour Fitness Center. Wait… that’s not a secret. I really HATE 24-Hour Fitness Center.

The locations near me always smell. The bathrooms are never clean – sometimes, they’re not even functioning. The machines are always crowded or broken. It’s a fucking dump. They always have Faux News on the TV screens, no matter how nicely you ask them to change the channel!

That’s why I stopped going a couple of years back, because they were just ludicrous. The idea that I would drive far away to exercise at a place I hated going to – it led me to jogging and cycling in the real world. And, you know what? I love that! I have never once looked back!

But Vicky has insisted that I keep my membership. “You never know,” she says, as year after year passes and month of dues after month of dues gets thrown away.

Today, I just got sick of it and decided to cancel my membership. Turns out, you can’t cancel online. You have to call a special number… then, you have to hold… forever… And you have to listen to this insipid hold message about how you’re being provided excellent service – even though you’re obviously not – repeated over and over and over again! I held for 15 minutes before someone picked up…

… and hung up on me!

Mother fuck!

So, I called back. Then, I held for 30 minutes before someone picked up and asked, “Why are you cancelling today?” To which I replied, “If I didn’t have a reason before the nightmare of being on hold, I have one now.”

I don’t want to sound bitter but I hate those fucking cocksuckers….

A Hex To Save Rynia - Book One of the Sons of Rynia Trilogy - available now for all e-readers!...

2011-08-23T15:49:00.000-07:00

Hey folks,

It's e-book release time again! Today sees the release of A Hex To Save Rynia, which is the first book of the forthcoming Sons of Rynia trilogy.

A Hex Upon Rynia was just the beginning. The Sons of Rynia trilogy kicks off with Tsurtor’s return, dragons, a conspiracy against the king, and a war-ravaged planet. When Hex is imprisoned back on Earth, will there be A Hex To Save Rynia?

You can find A Hex To Save Rynia for the Kindle on Amazon.com right here!
You can also find A Hex To Save Rynia for all e-readers through Smashwords right here!

I hope you enjoy it and hope you honor me with your kind reviews.

My place has always been in the theater…

2011-08-22T15:49:00.001-07:00

I’ve been waiting weeks to make this big announcement, as strings were pulled and tied and cut and strung behind the scenes: I have been offered and have accepted the position of Literary Manager at Hunger Artists Theatre in Fullerton.

This is a great opportunity. Not only will it result in more of my work being produced but it also brings me back to my home: the theater.

As many of you know, I started acting in theater over thirty years ago and have flirted with it back and forth since then. Now, I’m back to act to work and, most of all, to write.

You’ll be hearing much more about Hunger Artists on this blog moving forward as this will be my new home. And hope it will remain so for a very long time.

So goes the microwave…

2011-08-15T14:49:00.000-07:00

Our microwave oven died this weekend.

Actually, it may have begun its slow descent prior to that. Its death way a slow one and, I like to think, painless. The first signs were when it took me 10 minutes to nuke a burrito. After Vicky tried three bags of microwave popcorn until she realized it might not have been the popcorn that was the problem, we knew our microwave oven was doomed.

That’s when reality set in.

Before, we’d say, “Let’s go get a new microwave oven. They’re only like a hundred bucks. Let’s go get one.”

But with me being unemployed again, that changed into, “Wait a minute. What are we going to do? We can’t just go get another microwave oven. Those things are like a hundred bucks. We can’t afford that!”

The next day, I got a flat on my bike and used my last inner tube to fix it. Now, I can’t go cycling until I get a new tube – unless I really want to risk getting a flat. This morning, I found out the muffler on my car is shot.

Meanwhile – and, please, let me remind you again – I’m unemployed. I can’t so much as get an interview at Costco! (But, you know, here’s hoping…) I know Vicky deserves better than this but I there’s not a whole lot I can do. I already apply to every job I can find. On top of that, I’m scrambling to get more books online for sale, to get a play produced, to get publishers to notice me – I can’t do anything more.

I’m what you might call a victim of this shitty economy. And it sucks.

I have no real point to this, by the way. In case you’re wondering for the great reveal that gives the surprise ending – like “ta da”, I got a job – I don’t have one. I’m just feeling pretty shitty and I thought I’d share…

Once Upon a Fart...

2011-08-09T07:53:00.001-07:00

Have you ever considered that at any given moment you're probably breathing in someone else's fart?

Think about it. If you're in an elevator with someone who farts, you're bound to do it.

If you're in a room with several people and one of them farts, you're going to do it.

If you're in a building with a hundred people and ten of them fart, it's inevitable.

In a world full of billions of people, each of them farting in an enclosed atmosphere... well, you're pretty much stuck doing it.

How's it feel? Does it feel good?

... pervert...

OC-Centric opens soon!...

2011-08-08T06:11:00.000-07:00

In less than two weeks, OC-Centric (Orange County’s newest new play festival) opens at Chapman University. OC-Centric will feature my play, Myth of the Cubicle, along with several other fine works.
Be sure to buy your tickets soon! OC-Centric runs from 8/19 - 8/28!
The Myth of the Cubicle by Ken La Salle – In an absurd office of drones and burnouts, a young employee sees beyond the veil of illusion and tries to awaken his fellow wage slaves.

Greatest hits of Summer 2011…

2011-08-02T02:00:00.000-07:00

Here I am, back from my month-long siesta!

I suppose I should start at the beginning with the biggest hits of the last month, those being when my car was hit and the subsequent hit to my head.

It’s not a long story. I was heading to the store one afternoon when I had to make a left-hand turn at an intersection, heading northbound to eastbound. I stopped at the red light and, when the light turned green, pulled into the intersection to start my turn. There was a UPS driver on the other side of the intersection and I was waiting to see if he was driving straight through or if he would turn left as well. Just then, out of the corner of my left eye, I saw a car blaze through the intersection coming westbound, past the other cars stopped at the light. I only had time to think, “He’s going to hit,” when the car slammed into the front of my Honda Civic at no less than 45 mph, taking off the front of my car before it slid to a stop with a broken front axle.

The impact slammed my head against the door frame and, for a second, I wasn’t entirely sure what was going on. A bystander named Cameron helped me out of my car and walked me to the curb. I wasn’t bleeding or broken but I was shaking badly. I could barely lie on the concrete before the shaking became uncontrollable. Still, I had the presence of mind to call Vicky and tell her, “I’ve been in an accident and I don’t think I’ll be driving away from it. Can you come get me?”

This is where things got funny, though not funny “ha ha”. The ambulance arrived after witnesses called 911 and checked the passengers of the other car, two old people in a Mercedes. After determining the old people were okay, the ambulance left. As the drivers boarded their car, I was so shocked they didn’t bother to ask if I was okay, I joked, “Thanks for stopping by!”

The police arrived to take statements and, again, rather than ask if I was okay – I was beginning to feel very nauseated at this point – one asked if I could move my car, which now lay in pieces in the middle of the intersection. Surprisingly, it was drivable, if barely. I moved it to the curb. The female cop taking the statements got statements from the two witnesses to the effect that the Mercedes ran the red light. I said the Mercedes ran the red light. With it being three to one against the other driver, you’d think…

Nope, the female cop came back and asked me, “Why were you running the red light?”

“I wasn’t,” I told her, giving my statement again.

She went back to the old people in the Mercedes and, when she returned to me, insisted, “Well, it’s clear you ran the red light.” And I insisted again that I hadn’t, reminding her that the two witnesses supported my side of the story. At this point, she gave up and just sneered at me.

The Mercedes and my Honda were both towed away and Vicky took me home, insisting that I should have gone to the hospital. At this point, I was hurting quite a bit and nauseated so I agreed that Vicky could ask my doctor what was best at this point. My doctor said I should go to the hospital.

Off we went. At St. Joseph, I was feeling increasingly disoriented to the point where they had to put me into a wheelchair and (according to Vicky’s account) I pretty much lost it. I became completely disoriented, which prompted the hospital to check me in pretty fast. Back to the ER, I was wheeled and over the course of several hours was given CT scans and X-Rays and lots and lots of meds. I left there with prescriptions for more meds and the knowledge that I had suffered a concussion and soft tissue damage. (My doctor would later refer to this as “thousands of microscopic tears in your muscles”.)

The long and the short of it was that I wasn’t going to be getting up for a few days and, when I did, it was a couple of weeks before I was moving at anything approaching normal. After a bit, Vicky and I went to get the police report because, dammit, I wanted to sue the bastards who had hit me. I’m not usually prone to lawsuits; I’ve only done it once in my life. But when I found out how obviously the passengers in the Mercedes had lied, saying it was my fault, all I could think was that I wanted to see them punished.

The other driver was not cited for anything. Apparently, cops can only cite if they witness the infraction – no matter how many witnesses support the claim. When did this start? Sounds pretty fucked up to me. So, basically, you can kill a guy and never get arrested if a cop doesn’t see it??? I’m calling bullshit! But that’s what the cops said to us. So, fine. But I wanted to take these bastards to court and get some satisfaction!

And this is where things got funnier… and no, no “ha ha”… I couldn’t find a single lawyer who would pursue taking the driver to court because he was a liar or for pain and suffering, which I had plenty of! No, the best I could find was a lawyer who would sue for medical expenses, a few thousand dollars. So, basically, these guys have lied and are going to get away with it. It really pisses me off!

Anyway, fortunately for me, I had no permanent injuries that I know about. I’m jogging again and, once enough time passes for me to be sure I… no, wait… for Vicky to be sure I’m over the concussion, I can cycle again. So, at least, there’s that.

I can promise you, though, that if I had gone through a red light or if I had lied – two things I do not do – I would have had my license taken away. I would have been put in jail. I would have had my sorry ass sued.

There really is no justice sometimes.

Stopping to breathe…

2011-07-29T11:49:00.000-07:00

August’s entry for Recovering the Self is early and here it is.

I’ll be back for new updates in these parts next week now that I’ve taken a little time to stop and breathe. Hope you’re still breathing, too.

One day you're on top...

2011-07-15T06:32:00.000-07:00

We're halfway through the month and I've been bumped off the front page for a senior in high school - ah, humility! But you can still read the interview I did over at Connotation Press and my play, Murielle's Big Date, on this page...

July Recovering the Self is up...

2011-07-13T21:20:00.000-07:00

This month, I talk about an important factor for anyone chasing their dreams: having a support system!

On the job front and…

2011-07-10T04:07:00.000-07:00

I was going to say “All’s Quiet on The Jobstern Front” but even I know that makes me sound Malthusian!
So, the big news is that I am now a copywriter for an ad agency. Shocked? Me too! After applying for just about every job under the sun, the one I get is the job I’ve wanted for years, to finally work at an ad agency!
So, there you have it. Things are good and let’s hope I stay employed for a long while…
Oh, and there’s something else. I recently hit a writing wall (as explored over on the Ken La Salle blog) and I won’t be writing much for a brief while. That means I’ll be taking a break from the blog for just a bit. Feel free to check back, though. I shall return. In the meantime, just play nicely amongst yourselves…

Murielle’s Big Date in Connotation Press…

2011-07-01T11:08:00.001-07:00

For those of you who have never read one of my plays, Connotation Press is now giving you the opportunity. This month, Connotation Press is running my farce, Murielle’s Big Date, for you to enjoy.

They’ve also included at interview with me, wherein I discuss writing, theater, and many deep, philosophical things to be sure…

Hope you enjoy it!

Job Interviews: A Side By Side Comparison…

2011-06-24T11:00:00.001-07:00

Last Friday, I ended my week with a phone interview with a woman from a placement agency I’ve worked with in the past. Though I hadn’t worked with the woman, I figured from my experience with the placement agency that it would go well.

Boy, was I wrong.

The call began with questions about my experience, which is typical, but when I told her what I’d done, she refused to believe me. I said I’d written for the web and she said, “That’s just writing things that went on the web that’s not writing FOR the web.” I said I’d written advertisements and she said, “You just wrote text that was used in advertisements. That’s not the same thing.”

Seriously.

I couldn’t get her to understand that they were both the same and, after a torturous half hour, she called me a liar and said she refused to work with me.

… nice. Welcome to the world of the unemployed.

Now, cut to yesterday. Someone at an ad agency had seen my profile on Linkedin and, through a circuitous and confusing path, contacted me through another placement agency I use. This agency needed a writer who understood tech and wanted to bring me on. When I spoke with the contact, he didn’t wait a minute and asked me to meet with him right away.

“I’m not exactly ready,” I tapped danced. “I just need time to shave and –”

“Don’t worry about shaving. I know it’s last minute. I just want to meet to get the ball rolling.”

So, I met him. I think he was trying to see how I handled change and stress because, when we met, he said, “It means a lot to me that you were able to meet with me on such short notice.”

Working for an ad agency is a big step for any marketing copywriter. It’s really where you want to be. But to do it, you often already need experience – one of those wonderful Catch 22s… But he was fine with my lack of agency experience because, he said, I had so much good experience and talent that could be put to use.

When I told him about my background, he didn’t call me a liar or just assume I was trying to trick him.

I don’t know if I’ll get the job but you put those two interviews side by side and you see two very different styles. I really hope I get this ad agency job; it could mean a big step for me. If not, I hope I never get another interview where the person I meet with assumes I’m a liar.

A Hex Upon Rynia (the e-book) is now available for all e-readers...

2011-06-11T11:06:00.000-07:00

Hex may be one of the smartest men on earth, certainly one of its few real magicians, but that hasn’t stopped him from being alone. He can bring toys to life but his only real friend is a boy named Vincent. When Vincent sneaks into one of Hex’s magical experiments, they are both spirited away to the world of Rynia – of undead wars and stone giant usurpers, of terrifying sand creatures and a kingdom fighting for its life.

Hex is forced to take his magic to war while Vincent is rescued by a guerilla force of wizards and fighters, a talking walrus and a stick-man named Robert. Meanwhile, back on Earth, something of this magic has followed Hex and Vincent’s path back, ready to conquer a new world.

Witness a fantasy world unlike any other with topless helicopters and ice giants, violent battles and passionate love, a people on the edge of extinction with a story that must be experienced to be believed. Witness a Hex Upon Rynia!

A Hex Upon Rynia, the prequel to the entire Rynia Trilogy, is now available for all e-readers from Amazon.com, Smashwords, and wherever e-books are sold.

June's Recovering the Self...

2011-06-11T10:44:00.001-07:00

This month's Recovering the Self blog has been posted, in which I tackle the painful reality of what pursuing your dreams really means.
I hope you enjoy it.

http://www.recoveringself.com/self-esteem/down-to-earth

Is 45 years too late to review a movie? My review of The Great Race…

2011-06-10T10:07:00.000-07:00

When I was just a kid, my brother I used to sit down every weekend and watch The Family Film Festival with Tom Hatten on Channel 5. I think it was on Sunday mornings. On that show, about four or five times each year, they would play Popeye cartoons and old movies that the channel had secured the rights to very cheaply. You could tell they got the rights cheap because they’d play the same movies over and over. One of the movies they showed over and over, about four or five times each year, was The Great Race.

The Great Race is a Blake Edwards comedy from 1965, starring Jack Lemmon, Tony Curtis, Natalie Wood and so many others. It was one of those movies I saw so much that I could, and often did – to death, quote line by line.

I didn’t realize the profound affect it had on me until I watched it recently. I had dvr’ed the film off TCM (which I just LUV), having only seen it uncut once before many years ago. As I watched it, I realized that so many of the rapid-fire interchanges could have come out of something I wrote. Among the many influences I’ve had, this one is very clear.

And the movie still holds up today. So many things I loved as a child simply do not but The Great Race still had me laughing. Jack Lemmon’s energy is contagious. Tony Curtis’ meta-suavity is spot on. Natalie Wood is – well, this was when she looked amazing (when didn’t she?) – but her timing is wicked. Peter Falk is Peter Falk so you know he’s got it in spades. And there are so many others that just nail it.

The bad part? The music. As I’ve mentioned to others, this simply stops the show because it’s so god-awful. You end up in a pit stop, waiting for the music to end so you can get on with the enjoyment. I'm not talking about the soundtrack, which is wonderful; it's those damn showtunes. Stop it!

And much enjoyment is to be had. The thing about The Great Race is that it has so many moments of fucking brilliance that it can coast for a while and you don’t mind. Well, I didn’t. I just love this movie and feel so grateful knowing how it has inspired me.

Jogging with a stranger…

2011-05-27T10:42:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time, I used to take the edge off in the morning with a few cigarettes. Now, I take the edge off in the morning with a few miles – jogging them! What has happened to me? When did I grow up? And, crap, I think I lost my EDGE!

Okay, actually I’m not that worried. I like the way jogging makes me feel and it goes well with cycling. It’s rather surprising I’m still such a fat-ass, but I’m working on that.

This morning, I jogged five miles along the Santa Ana River Trail. The SART is a great place to jog; I’ve come to consider it my outdoor gym because I cycle there, too. Now that the sun has started coming out and spring has sprung, I don’t have to bundle up or wait until the day gets warm enough to go out. The only problem with spring springing is that the bugs of spring have sprung as well – into the air! Everywhere!

Most of my jog this morning seemed to be through a cloud of flying bugs, so many that you don’t dare open your mouth even to exhale. Eventually, most of the bugs will die off or move on as the weather turns drier and hotter… but not yet.

So, I jogged as best I could, keeping my mouth shut through a huge cloud of bugs. Sounds like fun, huh?

As I entered the last portion of my jog, a very attractive woman jogged past – which I’ll tell you up front is not that hard to do. I’m old, fat, and slow. Dig? She immediately caught my eye because she was, as previously state, very attractive. And I do not mind jogging around attractive women, even if it does make me unnaturally obsessed with my gut.

When I jog, I tend to jog in intervals. This is how they’re determined: when a fast song comes on my iPod, I jog, and when a slower song comes on my iPod, I walk. Sometimes, I get lucky and the iPod’s random setting gives me nothing but slow songs, but normally it’s 50/50 as it was today. When this woman passed me, I was slowing down. Then, I sped up and passed her. Then, I slowed down and she passed. She was doing intervals, too, as it turned out.

After a while, I realized we were both going down the same street. This was the street I always took to get back home but I couldn’t help wondering what she thought. Did she think I was following her? Stalking her?

I tried to just go about my business and not stare too much, as difficult as that was.

Every time I slowed down, she passed. When she slowed down, I passed. We did this for a couple of miles.

Then, when we reached my corner, she continued straight and I turned. I caught her head turn out of the corner of my eye, almost like, “Where are you going?” Ah, but I’m sorry. That was where I lives met and split once again.

I might jog with her again. You never know. Then, perhaps, we will be just a little less like strangers.

I honestly did not see this coming…

2011-05-21T07:49:00.000-07:00

I went to the optometrist this week for my yearly paranoia. Optometrists give me just the opposite feeling as dentists. When I see a dentist, I experience great pain to find out everything’s okay. At the optometrist’s office, I experience no pain and hear the worst news.

This time, after he checked my eyes out, he gave an irresolute shake of his head and said, “I’m not sure what we can do.”

Those aren’t words you want to hear from any doctor.

Turns out my eyes have started the downward slide I’d always feared and felt I had always been slightly putting off. The thing is my eyes suck. They always have. If you have an eye condition in mind, chances are I have it or have had it.

Oh, they’re healthy. He always tells me that, “Your eyes are healthy…” And then he adds, “But…”

It turns out my eyes are a bit schizophrenic. The vision in my right eye is diminishing as my left eye dominates. I’m going blind in my right eye. When the doctor tries to make me able to see through that eye, with glasses, the vision in my left eye actually gets worse. “It’s as if your left eye doesn’t want your right eye to see.”

Now, I’ve never had any Oedipal issues that I know about but I personally like seeing out of my right eye. It makes 3D so much more enjoyable.

Jokes aside, it kind of shook me, knowing that my best days of vision are long past.

The supreme joke here is what’s killing my vision the most is what I do. As my doctor put it, “If we could get you to not look at computer screens or read, your vision would probably improve.” Irony, you’re a bitch.

The Incarnations of Death - now available for all e-readers...

2011-05-16T17:50:00.000-07:00

Death can never be defeated and when Robert Erwon Mitchel does just that he sets off a chain of events that give birth to a new breed of superheroes. Now it is up to these heroes - Night Stalker, Fade, and Force - to find a way to stop the insane replacement for Death, one who can wipe out entire cities at a whim and who is hunting down the scientist who killed his predecessor!

Find out what happens in The Incarnations of Death! Now available for all e-readers through:
Amazon for your Kindle
Smashwords for all e-readers
and wherever fine e-books are sold!

New job, Odd Job…

2011-05-13T17:58:00.000-07:00

With the week ended, it’s time for me to catch up on goings on and other goings otherwise.

As you may know, I have found a new job that proves to be as fulfilling as it is not likely to make me rich. Here’s the scoop: I’m working part time with hours varying around the 20 hour mark writing educational material and marketing it as well. The material specializes in the education and treatment of special needs children. That’s where the fulfillment part comes in. The lack of riches, well, you can see that in the amount of hours I’m working.

The nice thing about this job is my new employer knows about my writing career. (I use the term “career” very loosely.) She knows I’m a writer and supports me in that endeavor. There’s no hiding it and nobody’s suggesting that I can’t do a proper job if I’m also pursuing a writing career. If anything, the only way being a writer has become a liability is that every time she thinks of something that needs writing she says, “Oh, you’re a writer, aren’t you?” But I can’t complain because that could turn into more hours and more money.

There is one more odd thing I want to share. After applying at just about every grocery store, department store, and other entry level job I could think of – you know, anything for an income – none of them have called. None of them. I don’t know if this is because they see me as too qualified or if they see me as too old. Is it an insult or a compliment? I know it’s like asking why the ugly girl didn’t ask me to the dance – I should be grateful – but I still wonder why I wasn’t asked.

Hopefully, this job will last a while. The plan is to give it six months. If everything works out as planned, it could keep up far longer than that. With all the things in the works for my writing career (again, very loosely defined)(and you’ll have to check out the Ken La Salle blog for that), I may stop much sooner and for very good reasons. Let’s hope so.

The Rohan Scripts e-book now available…

2011-05-10T17:01:00.000-07:00

The Rohan Scripts, Ken La Salle’s new novella about time travel and thrills, psychics and scientists, is now available for Kindle, iBook, Nook, and all e-readers for the very low price of just $2.99!

Get yours now! You can find it on Amazon.com. You can also find it at Smashwords. And you can find it wherever find e-books are sold. (If it's not solf there, the other books are not fine!)

The Prophesies of Nicoli Rohano, THE ROHAN SCRIPTS, were the stuff of legend for their uncanny accuracy and were all but lost to history… until now!

THE ROHAN SCRIPTS, the latest sci-fi adventure from Ken La Salle, brings you psychics and scientists, assassination plots and time paradox, with a single man flung through time and recording everything into a book of prognostication called: THE ROHAN SCRIPTS!

When the fabled ROHAN SCRIPTS mysteriously appear, they plunge a group of psychics headlong into the vortex of time. Working with physicist, Harris Feller, the psychics use the Rohan Scripts to create a prophesied time machine and when they use it the incredible energies and paradoxes of time travel reach into the past with an icy precision to snatch Nicoli Rohano and send him flinging through time. Now psychics and physicists alike must use the talents and devices at their disposal on an adventure through time itself to save the one man who can tell them how to make it all end with a book he is foretold to write, THE ROHAN SCRIPTS!

My Saturday – and, yes, I got a job…

2011-05-09T08:03:00.000-07:00

Saturday morning began with an easy-peasy visit to the OC Food Bank. The idea was to volunteer just a couple of hours helping pack boxes of food before going to a job interview I had scheduled for later in the day.

The food-packing was coordinated just like an assembly line. There were pallets of several kinds of food on each side and box would come down the line to pack the food in. So, one person would pack a jar of peanut butter from a pallet. Then, one person would pack a bag of rice, etc. etc. etc. It was pretty easy. People were even chilly from the morning and wore coats.

The box would go to the end of the line, get taped shut and then one person would take the 10-ish pound box and stack them on a pallet. That one person was me. While everyone else was lifting just a few ounces, I moved 10-ish pound boxes all morning long. I was sweating so hard after a while, it was clear I was the only one working – but, here’s the thing, nobody helped me out. This was mostly because I was the only muscular guy – but they didn’t even slow down! They were going at a furious pace! In the two hours we were there, I moved over 140 of those boxes!

Cut to the end and I’m sweaty and tired and even banged up quite a bit… and I still have a job interview to go to! I was tempted to call it off except that the woman I was meeting with had been kind enough to take time out of her Saturday… so, I went.

As tired as I was, I wasn’t at the top of my game. I didn’t even look particularly good. I figured I would simply apologize and explain what had happened and ride it out – so imagine my surprise when it didn’t seem to affect the direction the interview went in! Woody Allen famously said that 80% of success is showing up – well, I showed up and was offered the job.

The job is about a six-month contract, so far as we know. It may go on longer but that’s the minimum. I’ll be writing as well as using my marketing management skills so, at the very least, this should be very good for my resume. The best parts, though, are two-fold. First, I’ll be working on developing and marketing courses for parents of children with Autism, helping them help their children. I feel really good about that. Second, my new boss knows about and supports my efforts as a writer. Unlike previous jobs, this won’t require me to live a double-life quite so much.

I start Tuesday and I’m looking forward to it. It’s been a while since I made any money and I want to get the ball rolling.

After all this happened, Vicky and Jeff and I went up to Hollyweird to see my new show. You can read more about that on the Ken La Salle blog…

New Writing Gig: Recovering The Self...

2011-05-05T12:19:00.000-07:00

I start a new writing gig this week, guest blogging each month for the Recovering The Self site.

Recovering The Self, as you might know, is the magazing that published my piece last year called Little Victories. Now, I'll be appearing over there each month with new words on the journey of making your dreams come true.

This month's piece is on learning to say "YES". I hope you enjoy it.

And the people cheered…

2011-05-01T20:54:00.001-07:00

There’s been a lot of cheering today about the death of Osama bin Laden. On Facebook, Twitter, and in the news, a lot of people are very happy.

And that concerns me.

Justice is a very different thing from relishing in the death of a man. No matter if you believe Osama had anything to do with 9/11 or not, he was a criminal wanted by the United States and the United States had a mission to bring him to justice. They did that today. That mission is over.

But should we gloat and cheer over the death of a man? In a supposedly “Christian” nation, is this was Jesus would do? Is it what Buddha would suggest? I don’t know about you, but I can’t think of any single religion that would advise in this activity. As an athiest, I'm used to calling "hypocrite" but it pains me to do so today.

Cheering about the death of a man is worse than base. It is revolting. We should never revel in blood. Rather, we should kill only when necessary and then never cheer about death.

What kind of people are we that murder is so much fun and, as I’m sure will happen, people will take offense at the suggest that it shouldn’t be? We should be ashamed of ourselves.

But I don’t think we will be. Not at all.

We’ll take the religion and hold the science…

2011-04-28T09:27:00.000-07:00

I remember some years ago… okay, many years ago, spending time in science classes along with kids who would bitch and moan and carry on about how much they hated science. “When will we use this?” they’d ask, outraged. “We’re never going to use this!”

Meanwhile, many of those kids along with many kids today spend hours in church devoted to religious beliefs. When are you going to use something like transubstantiation? When are you going to use resurrection? Never. It’ll never happen.

It amazes me how much time we invest into religion in this country – hell, in this world – and how little we invest in science. Some of you might remember, during the last presidential election, how Republican nominees couldn’t come out fast enough against global warming (science) but for religion. Science is all around is. People are dying in the middle of the country right now due to storms made more extreme as the result of global warming. Island nations are being wiped out due to rising sea levels brought on by global warming. In Japan, radioactive hell is spreading as the result of a disastrous earthquake. We should be getting smarter so we can fight these problems.

But so many would rather pray.

Way to use that brain that you insist your “god” gave you…

“Well” is theater in excellent shape…

2011-04-24T11:19:00.000-07:00

It’s not exactly the norm for me to review theater on this blog but after seeing Panndora Productions’s performance of Lisa Kron’s Well last night at The Empire Theatre in Santa Ana, I feel compelled to do so. I must. This work found its way into my heart with a joy for life and love and inventiveness that I haven’t seen in theater for too long.

As a ersatz member of the theater community in Southern California (I was an actor once and have a bit of a reputation as a playwright), I see a lot of theater. Some of it’s good. Most of it isn’t. Recently, a friend said to me… wait. I have the quote. She said, “Yes, we all go to see shows and experience other theaters, to see our friends and how many times have we said ‘Oh that was soooo good. You were great,’ only to walk away to the local watering hole, criticize the show in our own way and then never think of it again. When was the last time you saw something on stage that moved you to rage? To be a better person? Or again in the very least, to just shout from the rooftops that you are alive.” She said that in regards to a project we’re working on but it applies so well here.

Well made me want to shout from the rooftops that I am alive. Panndora’s production filled me with more than a love for life; it made me grateful for the 90 minutes I was in that theater. Because it was nourishing and fulfilling and important – and GOOD!

I loved Well. My praise for it is complete and unequivocal. If you’re anywhere near Santa Ana between now and May 15th, you need to see Well.

MaryAnne Mosher’s direction is loose and fun, effortless. The show doesn’t look directed; it looks lived in. Sonja Berggren, who am I fortunate to call a friend and who I have worked with in the past and has never let me down, amazed and delighted me with her performance. The supporting case of J.J. Boone, Philip Bushell, Richard De Vicariis, and Pam Paulson are so much more than supporting players. They are amazing.

But most of all, it is Karen Wray with her dry, heart-felt, honest, beautiful performance as Lisa that makes the show. I have met Karen in the past and she was a very nice person and then I went on with my life. Something happened in Well, however, to change that. I fell in love with Karen Wray in Well. I wanted to watch her performance go on for the entire evening. I wanted to spend the night in the theater. The impact between writing and acting and directing, along with the alchemy of the other players, made this Karen Wray’s show. She can proud of this performance for years to come.

Go see Well. Buy your tickets now. You can do it online. Bring your friends and family. You will be so glad you did. You can find Panndora Productions online at http://www.panndoraproductions.com/. If you see it, let me know how much you enjoyed it and spread the word. This is theater worth supporting, not just because it’s art but because it is good.

How can you help Ken La Salle?...

2011-04-21T11:37:00.000-07:00

Many of you know me as Ken La Salle, the writer, the playwright, the legend – but did you know I also have books available online for Kindle, Nook, iPad and other e-readers? It’s true. You can find my word on Amazon, Smashwords, and other popular sites for digital books.

You may be asking yourself at this point, “How can I help Ken La Salle sell more of these books?” Good question. To answer this, I’ve assembled a simple, 5-step process below with ways that you can help me sell my books online. Only one of them costs any money!

Step One: Buy a book!

That’s right. If you have a Kindle, a Nook, Sony Reader, iPod Touch, iPad, iPhone, or another e-reading device, you can purchase my books at the following sites:

At my Amazon.com page: http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B004U6OFQ0

Or from my Smashwords page: https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/KenLaSalle

There are plenty of books to choose from in many genres and styles. Each are reasonably priced with some as little as $2.99!

But what if you don’t have an e-reader?

Step Two: Tell your friends!

There are many ways to tell your friends. You can…

A) Tell your friends. Yes, simply telling a person you know verbally is often a great way of spreading the word about my books.

B) Tell other people as well. Got a minute? Tell the person next to you about this great, new writer who is Ken La Salle.

C) Email your friends. Yes, the power of email is in your hands. Right now! Use it! Just forward this message – or selected bits (such as Step One) – to everyone you know. Heck, even if they don’t have an e-reader, they may know someone who does.

D) Lastly, you can deface public property. ... wait... no...

But what else can you do once you’ve told your friends, you ask?

Step Three: Keep telling!

There are plenty of ways to keep getting the word out. They’re cheap and effective. You can…

A) Post a link to my books on your blog. (Just as I'm doing here!) Yes, web logging (or “blogging”) is something all the kids do today and you hardly ever catch herpes. If you don’t have a blog, start one! Start up a “Books by Ken I Love” blog at Blogger.com. Heck, it’s free!!! Once you post my books on your blog, their search engine results will increase and raise visibility. It’s like putting the book in the front of the book store! (By the way, you could also print out the book covers and leave them at the front of book stores…)

B) Use Social Networking. If you have a Facebook account or a MySpace account or an account on any number of other social networking sites (heck, dating sites count too!), you can post a status update telling people about my books. You can post the link. You can even post your undying love… though that’s kinda creepy.

C) Twit her. No, wait… Twitter! Yes, the power of Twitter is in your hands, etc. etc. (And yes, it’s FREE!) Tweet about my books. It’ll give you something to Tweet about!

D) Lastly, have your friends do this as well! Yes, the more my books appear online – either their names or their links or anything about them – the higher my books go up in search engine results, which means more visibility for my books!

If you still have some energy left, and would like to help some more, you can!

Step Four: Some more!

There are even more ways you can help get the word out on Ken La Salle’s great books! You can…

A) Use Amazon’s “LIKE” button. Yes, you can “LIKE” all of my books, even if you haven’t read it, because you “LIKE” me!... You do “LIKE” me, don’t you?

B) Use Amazon’s SHARE buttons. You can share the book via email or on Facebook or Twitter with just the press of a button! Be the first kid on your block to share all the books!

C) Use Smashwords to get the word out! Each of my Smashwords listings includes buttons for sharing on Facebook, tweeting on Twitter, and a great deal more besides! Help get the word out with Smashwords!

D) My books are listed on other sites as well! Run a google search and find them. Then, LIKE them! Or share them from there! You can’t share enough, don’t you think?

You’re probably thinking, at this point, that you can’t possible do any more… But you can!

Step Five: Lie a little if you have to!

When all else fails, lie for me! Even if you haven’t read the books, you can say you have in many creative and innovative ways! You can…

A) Join Goodreads (it’s FREE at Goodreads.com) and rate my books. The higher they’re rated… you guessed it, the better I’ll do! Haven’t read them, you say? Don’t worry. I promise they’re good. You can even include a review and say, “It was good, just as Ken promised!”

B) Go back to Amazon and review my book there as well. You can say “I Loved It!” or “Sweet!” or even “I would kill any public official for a chance to read just one more book by Ken La Salle”… although you probably shouldn’t tell anyone I told you to do that last one…

C) Review my books on Smashwords!

D) You can even… no, branding my name on your forehead might be going just a little too far…

And that’s it!

It’s that easy!

New books are coming out all the time so please help where you can. I can’t do any of this without your help and without the help of everyone you know. That’s right. I’m going to need thousands of people to keep this going – so forward this on to everyone you know, whether you like them or not. Get the word out!

I THANK YOU!

Evertime & Evermore - now available on Smashwords for all e-readers...

2011-04-20T12:57:00.000-07:00

In Evertime, my love was lost upon a fallen shore...

and here I wait, awaiting Evertime and Evermore.

In Evertime and Evermore, playwright and author Ken La Salle collects some of his favorite poems for the first time. And now it is availble for all e-readers from Smashwords! (Just check out the link on the side of this page!) Some were taken from the darkest places from his life, like The Slaughterhouse (It is industry that has a reason in a world of others who wish to slaughter, themselves). Others are far more whimsical (Even organ donors have to face a little rejection. Might as well enjoy yourself a little pickle-type confection). Either way, many are accessible and enjoyable for any reader.

Death MIsses and other tales of death... now available on Smashwords for all e-readers...

2011-04-20T08:10:00.000-07:00

Just a note that my collection of horror and hor-larious tales, Death Misses and other tales of death, is now available for all e-readers, just check out the box on the side!

These works by Ken La Salle range from the bizarre to the morbid and even further beyond still. In Death Misses and other tales of death, Ken La Salle treats you to a dozen deadly tales to keep you up at night.

You’ll find out exactly what happens when Death misses and what lengths he’ll go to fix that.
You’ll meet a scientist who has overcome death, though it might overcome him.
You’ll encounter a man who can hear souls no matter where they are imprisoned.
You’ll learn for yourself the incredible secret of Stewart Rollings Mott.
You’ll find out just how much it costs to buy spiritual enlightenment.
You’ll witness the birth of a new kind of creature, one who sheds light.
You’ll find out when peeling isn’t quite enough for one man.
You’ll accompany one helpful soul who is looking for a way out.
You’ll know the terror that goes with an itch that is… just… out… of… reach…
You’ll read about a very helpful car that even gives you your keys.
You’ll sink inside the dreams of the dead.
And you’ll learn exactly why dead… ain’t.

Death Misses and other tales of death is a guided tour across the graveyard – but it’ll only bite you in the wallet a tiny bit.

A Grand Canyon now available on Amazon and Smashwords...

2011-04-20T07:54:00.000-07:00

For anyone who has faced the pit of despair, author Ken La Salle understands what that’s like. His own divorce and other events in his life drove him to the edge of the Grand Canyon. In his new book, A Grand Canyon, La Salle tells about the events that drove him there and what happened after he turned away from despair and self-destruction. A Grand Canyon has now been made available on Amazon and Smashwords for all e-readers: Kindle, Nook, iPad, you name it!

Author Ken La Salle has written over a dozen novels and his plays have been performed around Southern California, but his most personal work remained hidden until now.

In September 2002, Ken left his home and drove to the Grand Canyon to kill himself. The only life he'd ever known was little more than a shambles. He'd lost his wife and now he realized that he really couldn't live without her. All that was left was depression, booze, and guilt - with a running start and a jump over the edge, he would end it all.

Ken's story is filled with dysfunctional families, love found and lost, breakups, breakdowns, and his attempts to end it all. It's the true story of a man lost without love and too destroyed to think he deserves love. But the most amazing part of the story isn't what set him on the road to the Grand Canyon, it's what happened... afterwards...

“I had to put all of that behind me if I was going to move on with my life. The best way for me to do that, as a writer, was to put it all down in writing,” La Salle said.

Ken La Salle will soon see other collections and novels available in digital media. He is represented by Sullivan Maxx Literary Agency.

Vampire Society now available on Amazon and Smashwords...

2011-04-19T08:58:00.000-07:00

Vampire Society is a novel that shouts “LIAR” in the face of Ayn Rand. For those who have searched for a novel that counters the philosophy of selfish destruction, this is that novel. Vampire Society has now been made available on Amazon and Smashwords for all e-readers: Kindle, Nook, iPad, you name it!

Three kids leaving high school are faced with a world they'd hoped never to encounter. "You think you got any chance once you get outta here? You're nothing but grist for the mill, that's what you are! They'll feed off ya! They'll suck out everything you got and leave you dry." With these words, their eyes open to the Vampire Society in which they live.

Vampires live only to feed. Driven by their urges and desires, they are the ultimate consumers. And the Vampire Society is one that puts the Vampire on a pedestal.

Abby Ayrnes, the daughter of migrant workers, grows up knowing the price the vampire society demands. On either side are the angel and devil of the vampire society. Nathan West's admiration and desire drives him to be selfless. But it's Arthur Silvada, taking whatever he wants, who Abby finds she loves.

Vampire Society is a guided tour through the social and political evolution that opened our century. It is a love story and an indictment against our culture, answering the most important question about love: Is real love possible in the Vampire Society?

“The problem with Rand’s philosophy is that it leaves us in a wasteland, both emotional and philosophical. It tells us that our selfishness will be rewarded when, in fact, nothing is left but scorched earth,” Ken La Salle, the author of Vampire Society, said.

Ken La Salle will soon see other collections and novels available in digital media. He is represented by Sullivan Maxx Literary Agency.

Blue Food and other Menu Items now available on Amazon and Smashwords...

2011-04-18T13:27:00.000-07:00

Blue Food and other Menu Items, Ken La Salle’s first collection of short stories is now available on Amazon and Smashwords. This combination brings this short story collection to a wide variety of the most popular e-readers: Kindle, Nook, iPad, you name it! You can find Blue Food through either of the following links:

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Blue-Food-other-items-ebook/dp/B004TYYX1A/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1303157999&sr=1-1

Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/51617

The works of Ken La Salle range from the bizarre to the whimsical and even further beyond still. In Blue Food and other menu items, Ken La Salle treats you to a dozen tales, hilarious and deeply strange.

You’ll be introduced to Blue Food and find out why it never seemed to catch on in America.
You’ll meet Bigfoot’s Older Brother and find out just what it’s like to set Bigfoot up on a date.
You’ll be learn about how the dead make the best matchmakers, even if they can be a bit unconventional.
You’ll see for yourself just what the Problem With Swings is.
You’ll read about how saving earth might be just the thing for a little girl with Muscular Dystrophy.
You’ll be warned about Bobby’s Brother and his unusual habit.
You’ll know just how to stop an invading horde with the proper use of pizza.
You’ll delve into the mind of a madman whose madness is often served on a cone.
You’ll read from the lost book of Houston with a story about when Jesus met the Soothsayers.
You’ll encounter a strange married couple who would rather stay together if they can avoid killing each other.
You’ll witness a great new game show: What’s My Afterlife!
And you’ll finally find out the secret behind pheromones.

“These are all fun stories and the digital format makes reading them a breeze, anywhere,” the author commented. “With its low purchase price, it’s the perfect collection for someone who just wants a good laugh.”

Ken La Salle will soon see other collections and novels available in digital media. He is represented by Sullivan Maxx Literary Agency.

Sick and fast…

2011-04-18T08:56:00.000-07:00

I was going to go for a ride today…

I woke up at 6am with the idea that I’d get ready and hit the road by 7am. I got out of bed and thought, “Hmmm, I’m feeling a little under the weather.”

I went downstairs to feed the cat, who was complaining as always, and thought, “Hmmm, I’m not feeling so good. I should take some Advil.”

I poured myself a little orange juice and grabbed a few Advil and thought, “Damn, I think I’m actually feeling kind of sick.”

I walked back to the stairway to go upstairs and the floor fell away beneath me, my body shook, my bearings went all askew and I nearly fell down as I thought, “Holy crap, I’m dying!”

I struggled up the stairs and barely carried myself back to bed, panting, my body a limp noodle, all thoughts of my ride behind me.

It was 6:10am…

The thing about the closet…

2011-04-12T05:28:00.000-07:00

I recently came out rather strongly against being “in the closet” as a writer.

… then, bills needed to be paid.

The thing is, the closet has its benefits. If I can work a full-time job, I can usually pay my bills and buy stuff and not feel as if I’m going to lose my home.

Last week, I got a call about a full-time job as an Assistant Marketing Manager for a local tech firm. I wasn’t about to turn it down. Despite my loathing of the closet, I know better than to say “No” to an opportunity for employment. Anyway, since I stopped applying for full-time jobs, I figured this might be the last time I was called in to interview for a position as a marketing professional.

And the thing is, it went rather well. The Marketing Manager I met with had similar sensibilities as me and was very open to my (let’s call it “diverse”) background. She said the more experience you have, the better you look as a candidate. Believe it or not, I normally encounter people who will tell me that it’s not possible for me to have worked as both a technical writer and a marketing writer – not that’s it’s unlikely but that it’s impossible. Basically, they call me a liar.

After I came home, I told Vicky that if I don’t get this job I don’t deserve to work full-time. My logic is that if I am so bad at reading people in the corporate environment – if my corporate instincts are that bad – that I think I had a good interview when I actually just made an ass of myself, my days in marketing should be put behind me. The longer I spend in the trenches as a writer, the better those instincts develop. So, this is a good opportunity to either go or go home.

I should also acknowledge Vicky’s part in this. For those of you out there thinking that I’m taking advantage of her, you’re probably right. But she has clearly stated her support for me while also admitting that I need to find a job of some kind when my unemployment benefits run out – you know, since the whole “finding a marketing job” thing has panned out so successfully. This means, I am not above working retail for the first time in 20 years.

We’re walking a fine line between having faith in my abilities as a writer and keeping our home. The plan is to make those lines meet. We’ll see…

Government Overhaul 10-Step Program

2011-04-06T20:09:00.000-07:00

I read this reply to a story on Yahoo. I think it is a good start for solving some of the problems with the US Government.

This is what is needed to begin the long overdue overhaul of our government!

1. Term Limits. No more than two Congressional terms.

2. No Tenure / No Pension.

A Congressman collects a salary while in office and receives no pay when they are out of office.

3. Congress (past, present & future) participates in Social Security.

All funds in the Congressional retirement fund move to the Social Security system immediately. All future funds flow into the Social Security system, and Congress participates with the American people.

4. Congress can purchase their own retirement plan, just as all Americans may do.

5. Congress will no longer vote themselves a pay raise. Congressional pay will rise by vote of the people.

6. Congress loses their current health care system and participates in the same health care system as the American people.

7. Congress must equally abide by all laws they impose on the American people.

8. All contracts with past and present Congressmen are void effective 1/1/12. The American people did not make these contracts with Congressmen. Congressmen made all these contracts for themselves.

9. Make all lobbyists and special interest groups illegal. They have no basis or rights for their existence except the greed of the oligarchs they represent. This is the heart of our dysfunctional government system. This is "legal bribery" in America and the Supreme Court has sanctioned it.

10. All campaign contributions, corporate or private, cannot exceed $250 max. No candidate can use their OWN money to campaign with. This violates the constitutional principles of equal opportunities for ALL people in the nation. If candidates qualify for federal campaign monies, then that is what they can use. Otherwise, they hit the trail like everyone else for the last 200 years.

Serving in Congress is an honor, not a career. The Founding Fathers envisioned citizen legislators, so ours should serve their term(s), then go home and back to work.

Death Misses and other tales of death... now availble on Kindle...

2011-04-06T12:30:00.000-07:00

Today I am happy to announce that my next Kindle (and iPad Kindle app) book, Death Misses… and other tales of death, is now available from Amazon for just $2.99. You’ll find the pitch below and I hope you’ll find it soon on your e-reader. (Yes, iBooks and Nook and other formats will also soon be available.) If you know anyone with an iPad or Kindle, please share the news!

These works by Ken La Salle range from the bizarre to the morbid and even further beyond still. In Death Misses and other tales of death, Ken La Salle treats you to a dozen deadly tales to keep you up at night.

You’ll find out exactly what happens when Death misses and what lengths he’ll go to fix that.
You’ll meet a scientist who has overcome death, though it might overcome him.
You’ll encounter a man who can hear souls no matter where they are imprisoned.
You’ll learn for yourself the incredible secret of Stewart Rollings Mott.
You’ll find out just how much it costs to buy spiritual enlightenment.
You’ll witness the birth of a new kind of creature, one who sheds light.
You’ll find out when peeling isn’t quite enough for one man.
You’ll accompany one helpful soul who is looking for a way out.
You’ll know the terror that goes with an itch that is… just… out… of… reach…
You’ll read about a very helpful car that even gives you your keys.
You’ll sink inside the dreams of the dead.
And you’ll learn exactly why dead… ain’t.

Death Misses and other tales of death is a guided tour across the graveyard – but it’ll only bite you in the wallet a tiny bit.

A Grand Canyon, One Man's Journey Through Depression...

2011-04-04T09:57:00.000-07:00

Today I am happy to announce that my next Kindle (and iPad Kindle app) book, titled A Grand Canyon, One Man’s Journey Through Depression, is now available for just $4.95. (You can find the link to your right as well.) You’ll find the pitch below and I hope you’ll find it soon on your e-reader. (Yes, iBooks and Nook and other formats will also soon be available.) If you know anyone with an iPad or Kindle, please share the news!

Author Ken La Salle has written over a dozen novels and his plays have been performed around Southern California, but his most personal work remained hidden until now.

In September 2002, Ken left his home and drove to the Grand Canyon to kill himself. The only life he'd ever known was little more than a shambles. He'd lost his wife and now he realized that he really couldn't live without her. All that was left was depression, booze, and guilt - with a running start and a jump over the edge, he would end it all.

Ken's story is filled with dysfunctional families, love found and lost, breakups, breakdowns, and his attempts to end it all. It's the true story of a man lost without love and too destroyed to think he deserves love. But the most amazing part of the story isn't what set him on the road to the Grand Canyon; it's what happened... afterwards...

So, this is where the bad news comes in…

2011-04-02T07:06:00.000-07:00

Very few literary careers move in a progressively upwards direction, from base to summit. Most take detours along the way.

And so it is that I have the following bad news to report. Northern Frights Publishing is going on hiatus, temporarily shutting its doors as it weathers some difficult times. What this means to me is that the publication of Wormfood Island is no longer a certainty, in any sense. It is now off the table.

I know that quite a few of you have been looking forward to the publication of Wormfood Island. Believe me, so have I. This is sadly one of the truths of artistic endeavors: bad things happen. With this news following so closely on the heels of signing with an agent for Climbing Maya, it may still sting distinctly of whiplash but I feel compelled to believe that good things still do happen. As a matter of fact, with other writing by Ken La Salle coming out digitally and more theaters looking at my work with interest, I find I can face this change in plans regarding Wormfood Island with a tempered sort of optimism.

This is only a change in plans and it is temporary. I have gone over a few options regarding where to go next with the novel and will be pursuing those. In the meantime, a new book (Once Removed) is almost ready to go in front of agents and publishers. In this writer’s life, hope springs with each new project.

I want to thank all of you who have believed so strongly in me and in Wormfood Island. Your faith and enthusiasm always make this trip more worthwhile. Northern Frights has been nothing but decent and encouraging in a business too often filled with slimeballs and I hope that, despite this setback, we do ending up working together again.

There’s surely more to come and I’ll let you know when it does.

You can just imagine what this did to all the talk going on about “coming out of the closet”. Vicky’s first request was for me to give the closet a second chance. Then we talked about it and realized it’s not that easy. We’ve both worked hard for this to happen and, rather than backing off, the thing for us to do is to work even hard. So, we will.

Our partnership – our marriage – has weathered some tough times but we have always weathered them together. Vicky is an incredible part of my writing career because she takes those risks with me and shares in the reward.

Remember, everything changed in just one week. Who knows what next week will hold?

Evertime & Evermore, a collection of poetry...

2011-04-01T06:05:00.000-07:00

Today I am happy to announce that another short collection, titled Evertime and Everymore, a collection of poetry, is now available for your Kindle (or iPad’s Kindle app) for just $2.99. You’ll find the pitch below and I hope you’ll find it soon on your e-reader. (Yes, iBooks and Nook and other formats will also soon be available.) I've included the link to Amazon here as well as in the list to the right. If you know anyone with an iPad or Kindle, please share the news!

In Evertime, my love was lost upon a fallen shore...
and here I wait, awaiting Evertime and Evermore.

In Evertime and Evermore, playwright and author Ken La Salle collects some of his favorite poems for the first time. Some were taken from the darkest places from his life, like The Slaughterhouse (It is industry that has a reason in a world of others who wish to slaughter, themselves). Others are far more whimsical (Even organ donors have to face a little rejection. Might as well enjoy yourself a little pickle-type confection). Either way, many are accessible and enjoyable for any reader.

What I never realized was just how fast things would change…

2011-03-31T12:55:00.000-07:00

I’m sure I’ll use those very same words differently in a different context but, for now, I’m using them for the events of just the past few days.

It seems like the moment Sullivan Maxx signed me to represent my book, Climbing Maya, that was the moment I became a professional writer. It wasn’t when Myth of the Cubicle was produced last year or when I found out that Persecution Complex is being produced this year. It wasn’t when I sold Wormfood Island to Northern Frights Publishing, either, though it probably should have been.

I think things really changed with Climbing Maya because it just got too difficult to deny it any longer! And I was so used to denying it. Hell, I had been raised to deny it. I had been told from childhood that anything artistic should also have a “Plan B”. What happens when you tell someone to have a “Plan B” is that you spend so much time working on “Plan B” that you forget you’re supposed to identify yourself with PLAN A! (I discuss this further on the Ken La Salle blog, so let’s move on…)

While I’ve been spreading the news in my controlled kind of manner (“Look, I got an agent. Cool, huh?”), Vicky’s been spreading the news a bit differently (“Woo hoo! Money time! We’re rich, I tells ya! Riiiicccchhhhh!!!!”). I’ve been trying to caution her against getting her hopes too high.

All the same, though, things have changed. Rather than looking for a full-time job, I’m looking for something part-time, temporary. Who knows what kind of business the digital books will bring in once word on the other two gets out there? And the big desk Vicky just bought me, to replace the dinky desk I still use from 1986-ish, no longer feels like an unnecessary extravagance. I feel like I deserve it, which is a strange feeling for me.

I’m no longer the bum who can’t find a job. I’m the writer waiting for his check…

This is all going to take some getting used to.

Vampire Society, now available for Kindle and iPad Kindle app...

2011-03-30T10:05:00.000-07:00

Today I am happy to announce that my novel, Vampire Society, is now available for your Kindle (or iPad’s Kindle app) for just $5.95. You’ll find the pitch below and I hope you’ll find it soon on your e-reader. (Yes, iBooks and Nook and other formats will also soon be available.) I've included the link to Amazon here. If you know anyone with an iPad or Kindle, please share the news!

Three kids leaving high school are faced with a world they'd hoped never to encounter. "You think you got any chance once you get outta here? You're nothing but grist for the mill, that's what you are! They'll feed off ya! They'll suck out everything you got and leave you dry." With these words, their eyes open to the Vampire Society in which they live.

Vampires live only to feed. Driven by their urges and desires, they are the ultimate consumers. And the Vampire Society is one that puts the Vampire on a pedestal.

Abby Ayrnes, the daughter of migrant workers, grows up knowing the price the vampire society demands. On either side are the angel and devil of the vampire society. Nathan West's admiration and desire drives him to be selfless. But it's Arthur Silvada, taking whatever he wants, who Abby finds she loves.

Vampire Society is a guided tour through the social and political evolution that opened our century. It is a love story and an indictment against our culture, answering the most important question about love: Is real love possible in the Vampire Society?

The day I gave up and finally accepted my fate…

2011-03-29T16:51:00.000-07:00

Yesterday came the culmination of over half a decade of work. More than that, it was just another step in the payoff of over 30 years of work.

Yesterday, I signed a contract with Sullivan Maxx Literary Agency for them to represent my philosophical memoir, Climbing Maya.

And the entire kingdom rejoiced!!!

… then, after a while, Vicky and I got down to some of the business of our new situation. With new books appearing in Kindle, iBooks, Nook, etc. every week and Wormfood Island coming from Northern Frights Publishing this summer, with two theaters seriously considering producing my work this summer and now a literary agency – a good one – representing Climbing Maya… Vicky and I had to admit to ourselves that it looks like I’m going to be a professional writer.

Yes, you heard that right.

The day has come that I’ve been dreaming about most of my life!

… and we had to figure out how that was going to impact my job search. Basically, reality stinks, folks. We still need to pay the bills.

But this writing stuff takes a lot of time. We realized I wasn’t going to be able to manage it if I worked a full-time job. It was at that time that we revised our job search plan down to part-time… maybe.

After all, if my digital books sell even moderately well, the income might be enough so I can devote my time to my writing. If not, well, it’s something part-time for me.

The whole thing seems unreal, to tell you the truth. To think, someone said the words, “Your writing career means you won’t be able to work full-time.” It sounds like a joke, to tell you the truth.

Let’s hope it’s not. Okay?

BLUE FOOD and other menu items…

2011-03-28T10:19:00.000-07:00

Today I am happy to announce that a collection of my short stories, titled BLUE FOOD and other menu items, is now available for your Kindle (or iPad’s Kindle app) for just $2.99. You’ll find the pitch below and I hope you’ll find it soon on your e-reader. (Yes, iBooks and Nook and other formats will also soon be available.) You'll find the link to Amazon in the list to your right or you can just navigate to it by clicking here!

The works of Ken La Salle range from the bizarre to the whimsical and even further beyond still. In Blue Food and other menu items, Ken La Salle treats you to a dozen tales, hilarious and deeply strange.

You’ll be introduced to Blue Food and find out why it never seemed to catch on in America.
You’ll meet Bigfoot’s Older Brother and find out just what it’s like to set Bigfoot up on a date.
You’ll be learn about how the dead make the best matchmakers, even if they can be a bit unconventional.
You’ll see for yourself just what the Problem With Swings is.
You’ll read about how saving earth might be just the thing for a little girl with Muscular Dystrophy.
You’ll be warned about Bobby’s Brother and his unusual habit.
You’ll know just how to stop an invading horde with the proper use of pizza.
You’ll delve into the mind of a madman whose madness is often served on a cone.
You’ll read from the lost book of Houston with a story about when Jesus met the Soothsayers.
You’ll encounter a strange married couple who would rather stay together if they can avoid killing each other.
You’ll witness a great new game show: What’s My Afterlife!
And you’ll finally find out the secret behind pheromones.

Blue Food and other menu items is a little taste of craziness to lighten the soul – and it’ll only lighten your wallet a tiny bit.

The Final Countdown…

2011-03-25T11:31:00.000-07:00

Yes, I have that stupid song in my head now… dammit.

Actually, this entry is about something very different. It looks like I am now within weeks of losing my unemployment benefits – they are bone dry – and Vicky and I have started counting down the remaining days.

I find myself in an odd position. Vicky has such a relaxed attitude about things, so positive things will work out, she makes it hard for me to freak out. At the same time, I am Ken. Freaking out is second nature. Let’s say I’m conflicted. Will I find a job in my chosen career? Will I have to work retail or fast food for anything I can get? I don’t know.

The strangest thing about all of this is the timing. We are just months away from the release of Wormfood Island (from Northern Frights Publishing). Other developments are on the way, too. I should start seeing an at least semi-regular income from my writing this year. Maybe that’s why Vicky is so relaxed, because she knows that things are happening even if I have to take a shitty job.

I know I’ve said this before but I wouldn’t trade in this time I’ve had for anything. As much as I hate not having a job – it would be nice to have money – my writing career has taken huge leaps in the last two years. I mean, it looks like it is actually starting, you know? My writing is getting better and I have learned a whole lot more about the business. Would this have happened if I was employed? Perhaps. But I can tell you with all certainty that there is no better inspiration than fear, at least for me. I’ve become incredibly prolific of late and have my eyes firmly affixed to the future.

I don’t know how this will all turn out but I do know that the next phase begins in just a few weeks. Keep your eyes on this space. Things will change.

Alive Theatre – Vicky…

2011-03-22T09:53:00.001-07:00

Last night was the reading of Sometimes We Find Our Way at the Alive Theatre in Long Beach. For a full run-down on what I thought artistically, check out the Ken La Salle blog. In this space, however, I would like to talk about something (or, actually, someone) also essential: Vicky.

Vicky has always been a tremendous source of support. I couldn’t begin to tell you because it just extends in so many directions. She’s my proofreader, my cheerleader, and also very literally my financial backer. I couldn’t dream of someone more behind me in my artistic endeavors than Vicky.

But to give you some idea, let’s go to last night’s reading.

The workspace for Alive Theatre is located on 3rd Street in a little garage set way back off the street. It is not only difficult to find, it is also difficult to believe you’ve reached the right spot once you’re there. With this in mind, I did not wait inside with Vicky but waited outside on the cold street, where I could flag people down or greet them as they arrived.

Vicky, meanwhile, was greeting people inside, making them feel welcome, engaging them and helping pass the time while we awaited others. In this way, I began to think of Vicky as something like my first lady last night. She really was like my third arm, taking care of things when they slipped out of my grasp.

She also had a far better attitude about it than I did. When I asked her to guess how many people would show, she said a dozen in the audience alone. I guessed ten, counting the actors. It turned out we had an audience of 19, which was the best the theater had seen for all the plays they were considering!

Vicky saw to it that the actors had water if they needed it – I did. She also put together little gift bags for the two actresses working at my side. None of that would have happened if left up to me; I was too busy trying to make it work artistically, which is to say I was out to lunch.

I have often said how lucky I am to have Vicky in my life and working with me as a partner in my artistic endeavors. After a night like last night, I just wanted to share exactly what I mean by that.

Thanks, Vic.

So, this is what happens…

2011-03-19T07:04:00.001-07:00

As many of you know, I love Vicky.

Oh, I love her, love her, love her… but enough of that.

You’re probably wondering why I was up at 6am this fine, Saturday morning… well, I am.

Vicky set her alarm to go off at 6am and, sure enough, it did. And she hit the snooze bar and went back to sleep. I didn’t go back to sleep… but she did.

I lay awake, hoping to drop back off to sleep when the alarm went off again at 6:15am. She hit the snooze bar and went back to sleep.

This happens every morning.

I am a chronic early-riser thanks to my wife’s alarm clock. Too bad she isn’t as well. She’ll hit the snooze bar until 7:30am, sometimes 8am…

I can’t help but think this is somehow payback for something…

The only reason unemployed people look for work…

2011-03-17T07:39:00.000-07:00

I’ve got a lot going on these days with the readings and the writing (and I’m sure there’s bound to be some ‘rithmatic in there somewhere) but today I thought I’d focus on something that happened at a job interview I was at recently.

We were going over my resume and the woman said, “I see you’ve been doing some temp work? Some contract work? Trying to keep busy? To keep the skills in shape?”

Yes, that’s why I was working temp and contract jobs. To keep busy. Because I was so bored. It had nothing to do with paying my bills or having food to eat, you stupid bitch.

Of course, I smiled and nodded like they expect you to – because, at this point, I’ll endure any indignity if there’s a paycheck in it. But the idea that this woman’s worldview was so myopic as to think that unemployed people look for work simply out of boredom, for something to do, is so disturbing I just don’t know what to think.

Is this why stupid people so often think of the unemployed as lazy? Rather than hungry? We have plenty of incentives to work, believe me. We like the roof over our heads and would like to keep it there. Honest.

Oh… and the welfare mom down the street is not driving a BMW, either. (Just thought I’d get that out of the way while I was here…)

My child has allergies…

2011-03-13T06:55:00.001-07:00

I was just thinking about something I’ve heard just about enough of: “My child has allergies.”

“Can you make sure there’s no dairy in that? My child has allergies.”

“I can’t get the one with almonds. My child has allergies.”

“Can you make sure there are no peanut parts, peanut scrapings, peanut essence – Can you make sure there was no peanut in the state where this was made? My child has allergies.”

When I was a child, none of this would have been tolerated. Children would have died by the thousands – and often did! “You eat what you’re given and that’s it. I don’t care how it makes you not be able to breath!”

Listen, my own mother wouldn’t get me glasses as a child because she wanted me to be tough. “I don’t care if you’re blind. There are starving children in Africa who would be happy to have the eyes you have.”

Now that I think of it, is that why we never hear about the starving children in Africa? Because all of the food children can’t eat because of allergies is going over there?

Weeks without Vicky…

2011-03-10T20:11:00.000-08:00

Vicky wraps up her teaching gig this week. She’s been teaching for five weeks straight, every night after her day job. (Yes, I know I’m unemployed and a louse by default – let’s move on.) I’m sure she’s exhausted, no matter how much she loves it – but enough of her. I wanted to talk about me… you know, again.

Five and a half years after we were married and I never cease being surprised by it all. Let me say something here that I’ve been fairly public about and that Vicky and I both understand: Vicky was not the love of my life when we got married. When I married Vicky, I was happy to have found someone I could live with and work with – after my last marriage, I didn’t need another “love of my life”. They were just trouble.

Little did I realize that, with time, I find myself more in love with her than I ever thought possible. Nobody – and I mean nobody – holds a candle to her. She’s funny. She’s smart. And I find myself needing her, craving her. She has honestly become essential to my existence. Yes, I’ll admit it. She has become the love of my life, undeniably.

And did I mention she’s been away for five weeks?

It’s driving me crazy.

But I am buoyed by the knowledge of how well we work together, how nicely our partnership functions. There’s no doubt in my mind that Vicky does everything she does so that I can do everything I do. She makes my lifestyle possible – not just in the little ways but she literally makes it possible for me to be the person I am. I couldn’t pursue my writing as I do without her. Working on both plays and books, I know she’s got my back 100% and that gives me a wonderful sense of security.

So, while I miss her, I am not worried in any way. I know she’ll be back and our lives will settle into a new schedule until it changes again, as it always does. Our lives are constantly in motion, it seems, but we handle it all pretty well as a couple, as a team.

These weeks without Vicky have got me thinking about this and about how very lucky I’ve been. I couldn’t tell you if she’s been lucky at all but I know I have. And I can’t wait for this weekend to be over so I can tell her that to her face.

(NOTE: This is not to say that Vicky can’t be a complete bitch. She can and often is. If I didn’t say this, I know she’d read this blog entry thinking she was pretty bitchen. Okay, Vic. You’re bitchen. I’ll admit that. But behave yourself and don’t get too arrogant… Now, come over here and give me some sugar.)

Defending Everyone's Marriage Rights...

2011-03-05T17:42:00.001-08:00

There’s been a lot of talk in the news lately about the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). DOMA is support to “defend” marriage by making it illegal for many United States citizens from marrying. To be specific, it prevents gay people from marrying other gay people (unless they are a gay man and woman, which would be fine if unfathomable).

As a straight, married man, as a man who has all the rights DOMA specifically takes away from my gay brothers and sisters, I feel it about time I spoke out.

It seems to me that this restriction of rights is very familiar. The United States used to restrict the rights of a different group of Americans and it did it all very legally. Those, of course, we black Americans who were restricted from having equal rights to vote, drink from a water fountain, ride wherever they liked on a bus, and so many other things. Whites back then had the attitude of “I’ve got my rights. You’ll have to fend for yourself,” and those were the least malicious of them. This “I’ve got mine” attitude is not unique to Americans; we’re just really good at it.

And so, here we are doing it again, restricting the rights of a certain group of Americans under the thin veil of legality. This time, we’re doing it to gay Americans. Straight people might as well be saying, “It’s legal for me to marry. You’ll just have to fend for yourself.”

The fact that this has not been seen as a national disgrace is appalling. The fact that pro-gay rights people have not attacked this with the same fervor that they attacked Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell is just wrong. (Especially when you consider that the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell only increases a LGBT individual’s chances of dying in war, hardly a perk.) The support of equal marriage rights shouldn’t be seen as a gay/straight issue. My marriage rights are just as endangered when the rights of someone else are restricted.

Defense of Marriage? The only way marriage can ever be defended is when it is the right of all Americans. The so-called “political right” call it a “slippery slope” when all are afforded the same rights. They used a similar argument with regards to voting rights. But I say it’s a slippery slope when all Americans do not have equal rights. Who would they restrict next? The so-called “political right” talk about having to allow anyone to marry if they allow gays to marry and I say that argument has been absurd on the face of it since the beginning. It is indefensible and should never be allowed to stand. Allowing black Americans the right to vote did not turn into the disaster they said it would and neither will allowing all Americans equal marriage rights.

What all Americans have to realize is that the only way to defend your rights is to defend everyone’s rights. Otherwise, what’s the virtue of calling yourself American?

Cycling without a bike…

2011-03-03T10:24:00.000-08:00

This story begins, as so many do, last week.

I was out riding my Giant TCR2, having a really good morning ride. I was doing 16-18 mph pretty consistently and feeling pretty good when I realized something was catching on the pedal. For a while, I thought it was my foot catching on the bike frame – my feet are huge – but, looking down, I saw that wasn’t it.

For some reason, my left pedal and crank assembly was catching and my experience cycling told me that wasn’t good. I don’t have a lot of experience cycling but I do have enough to know about blowing out bottom brackets… mostly because I’ve blown out a couple of bottom brackets. You blow out your bottom bracket by riding your bike long after your bottom bracket starts to go, and it felt like my bottom bracket was starting to go.

I did the sensible thing and stopped. Sure enough, my left crank was getting wobbly. This time, instead of riding on it, I would do the smart thing and head back home. I went home and got my bike in the shop, hoping everything would be fine.

They were supposed to be finished with the bike on Tuesday, so I gave them a call yesterday to follow up since they hadn’t called me, yet. (Are all cycle shops horrible about calling when something is done? This is the second shop I’ve used regularly and they’re both like that!) Turned out, my bike wasn’t done… in fact, it wasn’t begun.

I hadn’t blown the bottom bracket this time. I had blown the entire crank assembly!

And this is where I beat myself up for being a lame-ass. (Not to mention a fat ass, which is the only way I can think that I broke that assembly!)

When I told Vicky, she reminded me of something I’d forgotten. I had put a couple thousand miles on my bike last year. Of course, things were going to break! This is what’s called “up-keep”! If it wasn’t for Vicky, I would probably still be beating myself up.

So, now the bike is getting back in shape for another year of cycling. In previous years, I didn’t start until later in April. This year, I’ve already begun. I’m shooting for 3,000 miles this year. I don’t know how close I’ll get but it’ll be fun trying. (Of course, it also depends on my work schedule… once I get a work schedule…) And I’ll keep going right away… once I get my bike back…

We’ve got a fun couple of months coming…

2011-03-01T10:02:00.000-08:00

(You may see this all over the place – or wherever I can post it. It’s important.)

March marks the beginning of a busy few months for my artistic growth and only a short lead-in to what will be a busier summer, I’m sure. Now, I know I’m blessed with quite a few people in my life who are looking to support my endeavors so let me spell it all out here so we know where we’re at.

March 21st. Monday evening, March 21st at 8pm, Alive Theatre in Long Beach will be considering my play, Sometimes We Find Our Way, for their 2012 season. The way this works is they’ll be holding a reading before an audience. They’ll be doing this for each show they’re considering and my show will be read that night. The cast will include the wonderful Stephanie Schulz, the incomparable Sonja Berggren, and myself in an inexcusable act of ego. My guess is that the best crowd stands the best chance.

I’m hoping you can be there to help me. The reading will be located at what the theater calls "The Farm". I won’t lie; it’s more on a “theater annex”. It’s a little hard to find off the street and parking is kind of a bitch (let's hear it for Long Beach street parking). But the theater is encouraging writers to bring an audience and if I could get a full-length produced that would certainly help me out quite a bit.

April 22 – May 21. Theatre of NOTE will be producing my short play, Persecution Complex, as part of their “Just the Tip” late night showcase. Persecution Complex is an insane look at relationships and neurosis and mobsters, oddly enough.

Of course, I’d love if you could go… but, and this is important, if you feel as though you need to choose between the two shows, I’d rather you go see Sometimes We Find Our Way. That is a full-length show up for consideration for a full production and that’s where I need the support. Mind you, if you can go to both, I would just love that. Heck, I certainly plan to go to both. But if you need to choose, I just wanted to let you know which way I hope you choose.
I’m including bit of information below to help you out.

This is Alive Theatre’s web site. This is their calendar. Look me up on March 21.

This is a map to their location. Actually, it’s a street-view as well, to give you an idea what it looks like. (Don’t be scared. There’s a theater in there. I’ll probably be waiting outside until the show starts to wave you in.)

And here’s the web site for Theatre of NOTE.
Thanks to all my incredible supporters through this crazy time. You’re all the best.

The trouble with bottom brackets…

2011-02-24T11:21:00.000-08:00

Time plays weird tricks. For example, when I think of my last cigarette, it feels like a long time ago. When I think of when I first started cycling, it feels like yesterday. And yet, I was still sneaking smokes when I started cycling… so that’s slightly askew.

I’ve been cycling now since 2007. That’s four years of riding. Every year, I get a little smarter, a little faster, a little better. That’s not too difficult because I started out really horribly. I mean, I sucked.

One thing has remained consistent, however, and that is my relationship with bottom brackets. Bottom Brackets are the part of your bike just between where the pedal’s cranks meet. They keep your pedals going so you can move. They’re supposed to be fairly stable. They’re not supposed to move around a whole lot.

I learned this with my first bike (as an adult). It was a converted mountain bike – basically, a mountain bike with road tires on it. I was riding for quite some time until the bottom bracket was so blown that the pedals were practically flapping like wings. No bueno! The guy at the bike shop actually lectured me.

After that, I got a little experience and got a little smarter. Riding my Giant road bike, I blew another bottom bracket but I noticed before the pedals started flapping. Still, I did plenty of damage before I brought it in to get fixed.

I don’t know what it is about me and bottom brackets. I just tear through them.

Today, for instance, as I was out on my morning ride, I realized that the pedals had a certain amount of give that they shouldn’t have had, a bit of play that told me, “Ken, you’re doing it again.” Rather than ignore it, I actually stopped and checked it out. Sure enough, the bottom bracket was going out. This time, though, I decided to do the smart thing… or, at least, the smartest thing I could do under the circumstances. I rode the bike straight home. I’ll take it into the shop this weekend and hope I caught it early enough to prevent anything too costly.

I don’t know if other cyclists have these issues. Maybe I’m just too hard on my bike. But I’m learning. I can say that. Maybe, by the time I’m 60, I’ll be smart enough to not bust the damned things in the first place…

Dilemma…

2011-02-22T19:14:00.000-08:00

I had a job interview today that, to be honest, could have gone better.

To start, it didn’t. The guy I was supposed to interview with kept asking me to wait in the lobby. We didn’t get moving until about 15 minutes after the appointment time.

Next, he was far from prepared. I got the impression he was lucky to have my resume, though it looked pretty banged up. I gave him a fresh resume and some other materials as well, which I hope helps in the end.

Worst, though, was the age old dilemma I’ve faced so many times. This interview was for a marketing coordinator position, which I am very qualified for. That said, I’ve also worked as a writer for many years as well. The dilemma, you see, is that some folks can’t understand that you can do both.

So, the interview began. “I see you just did some technical writing.”

“Yes, it was a contract position, which has since ended. Now, I’m excited about this marketing coordinator position.”

“Why don’t you just stick with tech writing?” he asked.

I could go on but it would be redundant. Some folks just can’t wrap their heads around a person who can do more than one thing.

In the end, it didn’t turn out well. Even after I pointed out areas I could help in where they were sadly lacking, this guy couldn’t understand that I can do more than technical writing.

It appears I’m still in the job market.

The Simple Things…

2011-02-20T09:42:00.000-08:00

They say the best things in life are free. I don’t know about that but I do know that very often they are cheap.

Take this morning, for instance. Vicky and I got out of bed a little while ago to walk our dogs. The day we have before us includes, in no particular order:

Watching the Daytona 500 (I’m rooting for Juan Pablo. Vicky is firmly in Team Gordon.)
A fresh, hot pot of coffee
Leftover pizza
Maybe hitting Del Taco for some cheap grub.

… and that’s it. That’s all.

Oh sure, I’ll fiddle with some video games – it is my “day off” after all. (Have I mentioned the “day off”? Vicky started it a while back so I’m not working seven days a week and I have grown to LOVE IT!) Vicky is going to do some work from home since she took yesterday off.

Overall, we’re going to veg. I'm just going to spend the day with Vic. And that’s nice.

It’s my favorite kind of day.

This is what I love…

2011-02-16T18:35:00.000-08:00

I found myself in San Francisco this weekend caught completely by surprise at having the best time of my life. It really snuck up on me. There I was, surrounded by beautiful women (Vicky), fellow writers who wanted to know what I thought, actors who admired my work, great food, funny conversation… It was simply amazing.

Then, I came home.

And I realize that real life never stops. I realize that this wonderful ride has to end at some point. I do.

In fact, let me drip a little more reality in before getting back to the wonderfulness so you know I’m not completely full of shit. I have only a few more unemployment checks remaining. In the past five months, I’ve applied for over 70 jobs – 70 that I’ve kept track of – with no response. Zero. Not a phone call. Nothing. For some reason I do not know, my career as a marketing professional appears to have come completely full stop. I will very soon have to take anything I can get: Costco, Target, whatever. I’ll have to do it or lose my home. I know that.

On top of that, my last book (Sleepwalker) received nothing but yawns and disgust from all the agencies and publishers I sent it to. Things are not looking great for me as a novelist.

So, why the hell am I so upbeat?

You know what they say: There’s no talking to an idiot.

No. Wait. That should be: Hope springs eternal.

I just finished my new mystery novel, Once Removed. Not only is it a lot of fun, it is a more sophisticated blend of romance and mystery and family drama. It takes my books to the next level. The next book I write will be another horror novel, my third. Hell, I never thought I’d write my first! The concept, which I won’t get into now, is far above a lot of stuff I see out there. It is really good – and I’m not really a fan of my own horror writing to begin with and I’m saying that. It will take me to that next level.

I’m getting better. I can feel it. Maybe it’s because I just spent a weekend in San Francisco with people who admire my work; I don’t know. It could also be the fact that I now spend an enormous amount of my time writing. You know, like a writer.

Check this out. I just finished the first draft of Once Removed in just over a month. Tomorrow, I’ll start working on my next play. Next week, when I finish the play, I’ll go back and work on rewriting and polishing Once Removed so it’s ready to submit to agencies and publishers. Then, I’ll do the same to the play. Then, I’ll start the next book. This will all happen before April!

That kind of schedule would have been unthinkable for me as recently as two years ago. I am now living and thinking – functioning – as a writer. And, yes, it will all be snatched out of my hands when my unemployment benefits run out in April.

It sucks.

That said, I want to get as much out of it as I can. Yes, this year, I want to write two more books. I also want to write a sequel to Wormfood Island when it comes out. I want Wormfood Island to sell well enough to justify a sequel. I have four more plays in my mind, ready to spring forth. I can do all this this year, easily, if I get the opportunity.

I am looking for that opportunity. I am looking for part-time writing jobs, temp writing jobs, contract writing jobs – hell, I’ll take all kinds of part-time jobs if they give me the opportunity to write.

I am ready to take that next step in my life.

Next month, I have a play being considered for full production in the 2012 season of an LA theater. In April, I have a short play being produced in Hollywood. This sounds like a dream and it kind of is. Sadly, it is not yet the kind of dream that makes money.

And it all comes down to money.

…

This weekend, when asked how I kept up this momentum of mine at the age of 45, I replied, “It doesn’t take any talent or skill. All it takes is blind stupidity. Think of any other job out there and imagine pursuing it for 25 years. Now, imagine someone saying that if you just got a little better they’d pay you. It wouldn’t happen. And yet, here I am.”

I got a bit of a laugh and, to some degree, I believe that.

But, you know, what I didn’t admit was the incredible love I have for what I do, the amazing thrill that comes when I finish a project, get an audience to laugh or to cry, create a book someone just can’t put down. It is an unbelievable experience and I feel fortunate to simply have made it this far.

Now, I want to go just a little farther.

(Yes, I know I'm posting this on both of my blogs but it's one of those things that really transcends both subject matters. This is my life and my love and my path - and it's Vicky's too. Vicky is an enormous part of it. Nothing makes me happer than seeing this through her eyes. I am very lucky.)

On Being British…

2011-02-15T06:55:00.000-08:00

One of the reasons I went into acting was because I was so insecure about myself. There was this feeling in my gut that said if I could be other people it was better than being me. The problem, though, was that there never were enough roles, enough shows, and I ended up having to be me far too often.

My solution to this problem was to not be me even when I had to be me. In high school – yes, that long ago – I adopted a British mannerism to try and sound cool, not realizing that I only looked like a dork. The accent didn’t just stick with me; it became difficult to use my normal voice at times. I was that accustomed to “speaking British”.

Those days passed and I grew up. I met my first wife and married her. Of course, being so insecure, I would often slip into my British voice in a vain attempt at impressing her. I’m sure it wasn’t too difficult for her to see through it and she’d tell me to stop. For 15 years, she told me to stop.

So, it shouldn’t come as any surprise that, when Vicky and I got together, my inclination towards putting on my British voice had been beaten down all together? Even when she asked me to do it, I wouldn’t. Even the thought of doing the voice was just embarrassing.

Which goes to show: Each relationship you have is built on the ruins of the one before.

Vicky wanted to hear my British accent, and not the dribs and drabs I’d give her.

I decided, then, to really let her have it. On Valentine’s Day morning, I gave her a card and within, I wrote, “Today, just for you, I will be British.” And, so, I was. I held up my British accent all day: in the hotel room in the morning, when we checked out, as we drove home, when we stopped at Starbucks… the whole drive.

I’m not sure how it was but I did notice that being out of practice had taken its toll. It took me a while to find it in my mouth. Accents are, to me, a matter of what I call “mouth feel”. If it feels right, it’ll sound right. And this isn’t just any British accent we’re talking about. It is what I call my “British voice”. That means it is the most natural accent for my mouth, the one I’d use if I was British. The difference between it and some accent is the difference between a caricature and a painting.

As I say, I kept it up all day. As the day progressed, my mouth sank into the voice, dropping the affectation and adapting to the fit. I realized something, though. And that is, drives down the length of California – or anywhere – don’t really call for talking very much. While I was using the voice, there wasn’t much reason to talk. And I wanted to talk! I wanted to show off my voice for Vicky who had waited this long to hear it…

Dammit.

And then, as we neared home, with Vicky behind the wheel, my voice suddenly returned to normal as I yelled, “Shiiiiiiit!” Vicky had neglected to stop and careened into a length of stopped cars. Just before we slammed into them, she changed lanes very quickly, basically scaring the voice right out of me.

Oh well. Maybe, I’ll get more comfortable trying on other voice for Vicky in the future. Maybe this was a one day thing. Either way: Happy Valentine’s Day, Vic.

Home of the Golden Gate…

2011-02-10T19:22:00.000-08:00

Vicky and I heading out to San Francisco this weekend for the staged reading of Murielle’s Big Date at the Dark Room Theatre on Saturday 2/13 @ 5pm. (Come one! Come all!)

It’s been so long since I was last in San Francisco that I actually had to think back for a minute. It was my first time meeting Axel. He was giving me a hard time about what the Golden Gate Bridge looked like at night. I’d say, “I don’t know. I was dark.” He’d say, “So, you really don’t know what the color of the Golden Gate Bridge is?” And round and round we’d go. I really kinda hated Axel as I left San Francisco but, in the end, he turned out to be an okay guy.

This trip fills me with misgivings. After all, I’m still out of work and so I really shouldn’t take the extravagance. On the other hand, Vicky’s never been to San Francisco and really wants to go so I don’t have much say in it. After all, this is Vicky.

We’ll have one free day, give or take, and I’m hoping we can just walk about and see some of the town. Eat at some funky places. See some funky people. Bitch about the hills. You know, fun stuff.

The next day will be the show. I’m packing about three different shirts for the show, though I’m not sure which one to wear. Truth be told, I’m a bit nervous. If over-packing is a sign of nerves, I’m extremely nervous.

Hopefully, nobody will be asking me what the Golden Gate Bridge looks like in the dark.